问中医几度秋凉(三)

TCM, its past, present and future（3)

Author: Ai Ning (China)

 录入者:医者佛心

作者:艾宁 

Chapter 61

The reason for the exist and continuation of western medicine is as for the exist of a general who usurp the throne of a kind king. The God would not hold the justice. The forcing power of the science is so strong that bring the human being to a no-return road. Look at the behavior of Mr. Zhang Gongyao, you would know that the barbarous act of the science and the “Cultural Revolution” is the same. But I look such barbarous act as the youth anxiety of the human being. It follows the growth of the human being. No one want the youth stop grow up for their anxiety that bears kind of risks.

I support Chinese medicine, but I don’t deny western medicine, or to stop western medicine. But I don’t want to improve the Chinese medicine to a too great level. I want to use the Chinese medicine to brake the speed of the history, don’t want it go too fast to turn off. Whenever one day, the science turns the human body nearly all as metal or plastic material, there would have no use for the Chinese medicine to work.

My daughter might feel confused sometimes when she felt pulse. Found her confusing feeling, her master would come to check. He asked patient: “Did you have surgical operation before?” “Have you had car accident?” He told my daughter, surgical operation or car accident can change body’s original circulation patter of the Qi and Blood. In these cases, it causes difficult in the pulse feeling. Nowadays, the use of surgical operations is so popular. It would eventually make the Yunqi theory not work in the human body. When there are many organs cut or removed off, and when there are many transplantations, insert of plastics or metal, how Chinese medicine could diagnose, and how it can treat a disease? At that time, why the Chinese medicine will not die?

Once the gene project breaks the barrier between the living things, the human would say by by to the earth with which the human body has been in a well harmony for long history. That time will be the time the Chinese medicine dies. At that day, would human feel regret? Of course he will. But to regret for the mistakes at young age is a law in human life. The curiosity of human cannot make it slow the step of science exploration. An individual is willing to pay his life for his adventure; the whole human being will also need to pay for the loss of valuable things including Chinese medicine. This might be the money our human being has to pay for pass?

From this point of view, the idea of the Mr. Zhang Gongyao is pretty early prediction. Chinese medicine indeed not follows the narrow science theory. Chinese medicine should and will go to death later. Chinese medicine is as the country level treasure panda in China. It is of very value, but does not match the current living conditions for it. It is not suitable to teach in school, not suitable to practice in hospital, not suitable to have an exam as the western medicine, even not match the thinking and view of current people.  We cannot prepare a social environment for the survival of the Chinese medicine in a new place and with a new way, right? Chinese medicine wishes to be protected as the panda, no wonder why the people as Mr. Zhang Gongyao are so angry. I would say however, Chinese medicine should not be destroyed today, since it is needed in current time. China needs it and the western medicine needs it too. The reason that the Chinese medicine should not be thrown away now is clear and known even by those who oppose it.  

Those who oppose the Chinese medicine said, the reason that the Minister of Heath of China stood out to support the Chinese medicine is due to the fact that there is no proper condition in China to popularize the western medicine yet. They said it is as the same as the Chairman Mao did before. He did not agree to delete Chinese medicine in China, since it would make the large population in the countryside no any medicine, no any healthcare; and the population in the city cannot afford the healthcare either. Those people cited the word of a western person: “Herbal therapy is the base of poor medicine”. They said, the reason that the state healthcare authority cannot admit the Chinese medicine is a pseudo-science is that, once they admit it, they cannot explain to those of people who cannot afford the western medicine. It is the poor that supports the lie. They said that to use the Chinese medicine to cheat the farmers, ordinary people and poor people, is to make sure the rich people and the officers can use the western medicine facility for themselves, so they induce out a political nature of the conflict.

I am not talking about politic, but I admit that the Chinese medicine is the medicine for poor people. We all know it is impossible to let the people in whole of the world live in the same way as those in USA, since the USA that has only 3 billions of population occupies more than half of the natural resources in the world. It does not leave more space for other countries. The healthcare cost in US is 13000 billions per year. The GDP in China is only about 35000 billions per year. If we use all of the GDP to solve the need of drugs for the 13 billions Chinese, the total sum of the drug would also be only one fifth of that in US. How could the western medicine ensures the healthcare need of all Chinese? In this condition, how can we stop the Chinese medicine? In such condition, what’s the aim or propose to stop Chinese medicine?

If my daughter blames me because I am not rich, if she blames me for the reason when she got common cold, I did not bring her to hospital for intravenous infusion, but let her drink ginger soup, if she believes that I cheat her, thinks that it is a very pity thing for her, how could I defense myself? Could I denounce her not sensible, as my parents denounced me in my early years? If the ginger soup can solve the common cold, I think it is not necessary to bring her to hospital for infusion.

I do not envy that rich people goes to hospital for treatment. I know that, the development of the western medicine also bases on the trying and experimenting on alive body, again and again. Even within the western medicine, the traditional way of treatment is safe and cheap. Why not let the rich people to got the hospital as an experiment volunteer, I myself chose the conservative way of treatment? Chinese know that, experienced formula can treat severe diseases. They know that 500 gram of force may turn 1000 kg stuff to turn. They know that the inner nature of a person cannot be read from his face. They know that there is always more clever people than the current clever people. They know that under an ordinary grass there may hide a tiger or a lion. They know that anything in the world there must have another thing to beat it, to combat it, or to win it. They know that there could a power to let the sun shine again by removing the cloud, and that there could be mysterious in the world in the disease treatment. Therefore, they do not look down the herbs because the herbs are picked up from the yard in front of the door. They do not think this is a cheat to feel sad, to look the whole world as a dark, so to get depression inevitably. They do not blame China because the China is not as rich as US, as you do not blame your parents because they are not rich. To me, it is the slave of the US spirit and it is pity that someone refuses to drink ginger soup since he cannot go to hospital for intravenous infusion, refuses to eat corn bread since he cannot afford fine bread, fees depression since there is no 13000 billions of healthcare money to us; or refuses to live since not pass the exam for a famous university.

Chapter 62

In Chinese medicine, it does not mean that the Chinese medicine refuses to use logic assessment but that the result is far away from the aim of the assessment. [1] For example in Chinese medicine textbooks, in the chapter on the property of herbs, the herbs that can be used to reduce body temperature are grouped together. Many herbs have such function, such as Shigao and Dilong. The herbs in this group have only one common property: reduce fever. What’s their difference? No explanation at all, since it is hard to be classified them with logic way of thinking. This is why the student will feel hard to use the knowledge in their later clinic work, though they feel clear in the mind during the class learning and easy to pass the exam.

According to the express and understand in Chinese medicine per se, there are very large difference among those herbs in the same group. If we regard the fever as a Fire, there are many different ways to reduce the Fire. Some herbs work to reduce the Fire as to pour water over the Fire. Some as to remove the woods from under the pot; some as to blow off the Fire or to blow over the boiling water (if the heat is due to the mixture of the wet and the fire); also some as to lift the water, then pour it down, repeatedly. In different clinic condition, the herbs needed are quite different. If there are much woods with big fire, would blowing not cause more strong fire? If it the Fire in the grass, how can we remove the woods under the fire? So, it is the way of using herbs that determines the way of expression in Chinese medicine.  If we talk about the function of chess, we can talk the function of the general, the firegun, the horse in the chess with logic thinking. If we talk about go, how can we talk about the function of each point or whole points with the logic thinking? Only in the relationship with other points, the function of the specific points can be talked.

I never say that Chinese medicine is “mysterious”, “deep concept”, or “marvelous”. As there is no great philosopher in China, Chinese medicine is also a Cinderella. If it needs admired, it needs more outside conditions, such as castle, slaver, liege subjects, and a title of  queen consort. If we admired her dignity, beauty, and elegant, when she went to the market to buy vegetables with a basket in her arm, how would we not get laughed at?

Chinese medicine is as the go match. It cannot be abstracted, or objected. Its life is its replacement of objective with its reality. It would lose concrete meaning, or real significance, if it is isolated, peeled out from the reality, from its relationship with other points around it, or from a local potential. To talk about Chinese medicine in a objective point of view, as to talk go out of the go plate. To do this way, there is no way to talk or no meaning. Not everything can be clearly defined. Not everything can be evaluated or analyzed with the way of “if not this, it would be that”, such substantial evidence. I know it is very hard to let people admit that a theory is a scientific area, a scholarship, or a leaning that cannot be objected. In fact, when I explain the Chinese medicine, I am not going to convince people to admit it, but want people not to absolutely believe in the logic.

Chinese medicine does not make itself objective. It does not define its goal, nor itself. It explains itself during the explanation of the pathologic course. When you understand it, it becomes your mind. You can then using your own way to explain it. Chinese medicine explains itself in the current time, is to realize its current value, and to express its current exist. Chinese medicine does not exist out of human body. Human body per se is medicine. Human and medicine is the same body. Once human body becomes a stuff, Chinese medicine will lose its condition to exist too. The theory of the Yin-Yang and Five-elements might not be so perfect, but it is the only theory to combine the human and the stuff together, rather than to separate them. The great value of the Chinese medicine is: it is the medicine of human, not a medicine for human. It might be good to be able to objectify a stuff, but the pre-condition is that such objectification bears meaning. The meaning means to human being.

To explain the world from the human point of view is super to do so from the stuff point of view. The world becomes significant since it is explained by human. I have consulted a expert in western medicine in Beijing: why an apparently very simple question has no commonly suitable solution, such as common cold, birth control… He told me, no any medical method can be used for every person. There would always some “fish that escapes of fishnet”. Therefore, it is needed to develop new method. By this way, the methods to a single disease, used by the western medicine, become more and more. But the current problem with the western medicine is: it is impossible to know which method works which not. It needs to be tested one by one. It might be that, after testing ten, then find one eventually. I said, by this way, all of us are not experimental mouse? The expert said, yes, we all are experimental mouse, in some points. I asked, if I experimented all of the methods, and failed, does that mean that I am victim of the experiment? The expert said in smile: just because there is the “victim”, the medicine can continue to develop and invent new methods.

Western medicine has given us a forever hope in medicine. For example, the killing power of the penicillin many years ago. But very soon human the bacteria developed resistance to the biotic. The forever hope broken. Currently, the difficult for the western medicine is that it does not know which method works, among so many methods. Next, would the western medicine learn to “treatment based on overall evaluation of the illness”? The use of the various biotic drugs should also be classified into the Chinese style: “watering”, “remove woods”, “blowing off” and so on” ? One of my colleagues had fever. She was tested tens kinds of biotic without any use. Now, western medicine can do bacteria culture. Pick up little bacteria sample from your body, try to test in lab, not in your body. Spray various antibiotic to the culture dishes, see the bacteria in which dish would die. When the western medicine takes the heavy responsibility of healthcare for whole human being, we found that, it tends to use the similar manner as the Chinese medicine, independent of whether it wants or not, no matter if the current people admit this or not openly. When the western medicine faces ten patients with ten methods in hands, it does not know how to avoid to use the ten methods in each patients so to spend the costs for the hundred trying. In this case, should the western medicine learn from Chinese medicine, to try to find the specific co-relationship between each patient (his condition) and each antibiotic (method), before to force the every patient as experimental mouse, and to waste a lot of healthcare facility (such as bacterial culture)?

Chapter 63

These days, I am helping some students to apply for university. Some students do not know which subject is good for them. Since it is hard to them to make decision, I left a form for them to sign: psychology test, to see what subject suits for them. When my daughter studied the psychology, she brought back a thick of forms. It makes me sign with emotion, the development of psychology is so much and so fast. However, when I choose the subject for these students, I was refused again and again: “I am not going to learn psychology, I don’t want to deal with mad people.” “No law, I don’t want to deal with criminals.” “I don’t want to learn medicine, I don’t want to deal with patients.”… I cannot understand, where comes so much taboos? If exclude all of the “people with trouble”, are any there any people left? We don’t want to deal with human? Generally speaking, the difference between the normal people and people with mental disorders might be the loss of the reasoning in those patients. However, human can be really reasoning, so reasoning to escape people with mental disorders?

Since my mother has many patients with mental disorders, I have lots of chance to meet such patients. Later, I also have met and had some friends who are doctors in psychology, one of which is a expert. His master is a researcher in “731” troop. He was not “suppressed” for some academic reasons. When I first met him, I asked him: “Excuse me, how could I feel that you are the same as your patients, in any aspects?” He told me frankly: he himself is a patient with mental disorder in deed. I know from him, the occupational disease for the doctor in psychology is mental disorder. He brought off a lot of thick books from his bookshelves, and pointed out one to me the names of the authors. There were black frames around each name. He said they are all his teachers and masters. “Know how they died?” He asked me. Of course I don’t know. He told me: “All died from suicide.” This made me hard to understand. Expert in mental disease died of suicide. Their learning and theory cannot solve their own problem? He told me, these people were very reasoning. They brought the posthumous papers and work certificate and so on and tried the best to prepare everything ready before they died. They did not die due to mad or to the loss of reasoning, but died very “reasoning”. This expert was also very “reasoning”. He is deep in knowledge, fine in thinking, and very strong in logic.

During conversation with him, I found that he hardly endured human language. Make a conclusion? Wrong. Description? Not correct. No matter how you speak, you cannot meet his logic need. It made my fear to talk. No way, I told him: “I am not going to describe, I show to you.”. He however was very glad, thought it was the best way to communicate, since by this way, he could make conclusion by himself through his own observation and finding.  At that time, there was a young doctor following him. The young doctor is a nurse in an army. Later he was sent to the Mental hospital to work. The young doctor wanted to learn the true skill of the expert. He would like to serve the expert, to see how the expert works. After twenty years, this young doctor became an expert too, with his hair turned gray.

There are a lot of anti-mental disorder drugs in the table drawers in my office. If eat several tablets, one would see the God. All are prescribed by that young doctor for several of my friends. I asked him to do so and kept the drugs in my place. If you see that I hurried up walking or running, morning or night, it is not that I am exercising but to send the medicine to my friends. Many patients with mental disease refused to go to the mental hospital. So, sometime, I need to invite that young doctor to my office as a quest. Others may see that I am talking with two friends, but in fact I am covering the young doctor to work. See this young doctor, I thought the expert before. This young doctor is as same reasoning as that expert. I admit that his current level has reached to the level of an expert.

My patient friends are all sly and capricious. They regarded the young mental doctor not as a doctor who I invited to see their disease but an enemy whom I found for them. They tried their best to make thing difficult for him, but it did not beat him. When he made the condition stable for my friends, my friends usually invited him for a party. During the party, he did not eat or drink at all. He even did not drink a mouth of water. From the beginning to the end, he even did not lift the chopsticks. What I needed to do is to make all of thing appeared natural and normal. What he did was only one thing: talk. That mouth could not stop for eat. My friends fond that I was so “natural”. They all appeared “sensible” too. They did not disturb the doctor from talking. After the party, they asked me: “Why I find that the doctor is more severe for his own mental disorder than mine?” The young doctor got the same professional disease as his expert master.

Sometime, when I bypassed the mental hospital, I would come in to visit with the doctors there. One time, I knocked the door. A young man with white coat came, stared me with a typical nervous eyes at me. He was testing my own normal level of emotion. I said hallow to time, smiled… but he moved no one inch, did not open the door for me. I thought that he was a patient, so pretended to be a doctor, stared him, cried loudly, he opened the door for me. After coming, I went into the office for doctors and said: “How could you let a patient watching the door, and allow him wear white color working coat?” All doctors there laughed. They said: that guy is the graduated student, who was new here. I felt strange with hearing what they explained. How could he got the occupational disease when he just started his occupation?

During chatting, doctors like to make mental analysis for people. They also made assessment to me sometimes. Their conclusion is that I also have mental disease. I was not angry, since in their eyes, no one is not a mental disease patient. I listened they said that Hitler is slight mania syndrome. I nodded. They said Lenin is also slight mania, and… I thought, Jusus, Devadatta, no one can escape the mental disease in their eyes. Since no one is not a mental disease, how about me?

Then, from Chinese medicine, in fact from my mother, I do not feel that a mental disorder is some disease that changes the nature of human. From the western medicine, there is neither a clear definition for the mental disease either. Now, the western world also changed its idea about the mental disease. There is a film with the name of << Beauty Heart >. It admired a “beautiful bain”. The owner of the brain is Nobel Price owner Hohn Nash – a patient with a lifelong mental disease. When he came to China for world conference of mathematician, the Chinese journalists were told not to flash light towards him. At the end of the film, when showing that he accepted the Price, he saw his illusion figure was there too for the party. He looked at them… If the mad person is perceptual, then the mental doctor is very rationing. How the doctors could also the disorder in their mental? Often, doctor does not worry not being able to cure the disease. He worries that these patients, after cure, cannot live in normal way in society. Reality, is the reason for many people to get mental disorder.

The reason for a person becomes mad, is just that the body activates the self-protection mechanism. Human being is not a rationing animal. I have a friend. When he drove a car and tried to avoid another car that showed suddenly in his front, he turned the wheel to the left subconsciously. This resulted in the death of his mother, who sat beside him. He saw by his eyes that his mother died in front of him, but he lost memory. He only lost the memory for this time period, nothing else. He strongly believes that it was his older brother who made his mother died. He so cared his old brother from time to time, with the aim to reduce his brother’s “guilty feeling”. I stayed with him every day. I found that, apart from the memory loss for this time period, he had nothing else wrong. Just from this point, I feel pity very much that university student jumped from building for suicide. I oppose that people do nothing about them, but say that the student has “mental disorder”. Mental patient can also have beauty brain. We should not give up our care and love for them with the excuse of some medical reasons.

Chapter 64

Yesterday, when I and my friend walked in the street, we met a doctor who came back from Beijing visiting his family. My friend consulted with the doctor about his disease. The doctor is western medicine doctor. He performs surgical operation quite often. After asked some lab test results, the doctor told my friend to care about his liver and gallbladder and told him the relationship between the kidney and the liver and the gallbladder. My fried said his gallbladder has been removed. No problem needed to worry. The doctor pulled down his face and said: “What I mean the relationship between organs is not from western medicine point of view.” I laughed beside. I thought, if a doctor comes from a western world to China for practice, he must feel confused, in China, the line that separate the western medicine and Chinese medicine is not very clear. In addition, the way and the manner of Chinese in the treatment would also cause confusion to the doctor.  

I met a friend whom I did not see for several months. I asked where has he been. He said he went to doctor. He got leukemia. I looked at him with surprise. He looked the same as before. It is hard to see him a patient with leukemia. He said he went and lived in the hematology institute Tianjing (China). Doctors said he needed at least four chemotherapy periods to make the disease stable. During the first chemotherapy, he continued to collect information, analyzed the data comprehensively, then believed that one period of chemotherapy is enough. So he escaped from the institute without telling the doctors. He did not even tell his family. He went to the Northeast of China, found a Chinese medicine doctor, and started herbal therapy, until the disease was completely under control. He said with very happy that he did not spend many money but got the disease under control. Seeing that he treated the leukemia as a common cold, I have to admired him having strong idea.   

I then cannot prevent to think, if he is western people, where could he run? It is very interesting the things in China. I know of a old doctor in Chinese medicine. He died the year before last year. He was originally a doctor in western medicine, but he later also learned Chinese medicine. I saw by myself that he cured the cancer for my friend’s father. He used herbal paste in front and on the back of the chest, as well as let the patient to drink herbal tea. I questioned why he charged so much, since there are no such expensive herbs in the world. He told me, his formula was left from another old doctor in Chinese medicine. The formula is not special but the herbs were real ones that he got many years ago. After using, there would have no more to use. He said: “I have only such amount. With the use, it will be less and less. After it is finished, I cannot treat cancer any longer. I have to depended on income from these herbs for my old age”.

From this, I thought, that the reason that my mother excellent healing effect was also largely due to the high quality herbs she used. She kept to collect and store the herbs. I question if she can still had similar good results if she worked in big hospital. My mother had given me a piece of “Loutai Gao”. [1] The deer placenta came from a deer that was hunt by a hunter. He brought it to my mother to prepare it into herb paste. He later left a piece of the paste to my mother as a reward. My mother used it for the treatment of infertility for women. The results were excellent. Mother told me that it cannot be eat too much. I can only eat a small piece as size of a soya bean. Sometimes, when I ate only such amount, I could feet a strong feeling from it. Many years later, when I want to prepare this herb for my daughter, I found that, it is impossible to find real “Lutai Gao”. Though I went to the deer farm to buy, I could not feel clear effect even if I eat a bigger piece of it. Then I realized that how good my mother’s herbs. In this time, I understand why the Chinese medicine falls down. If my mother could live to today, her healing effect might not be as good as that early years, since she would have no proper herbs to use. It is impossible that the current doctor go to mountains to collect herbs as my mother or to collect herbs from folk. When I was young, I help my mother to put some herbs into wine, or fold some herbs with plastic paper and sealed with wax… That my mother was so confidence when she worked in clinic might be due to the herbs she had in her herbal cabinet.  

My daughter’s master worked in Chinese medicine hospital and directed the herbal preparation by him self. Every dose of herbs to patients needed to be checked by him. What he checked was the quality of the herbs. He said, he do not chase for the quality of the herbs, but real herbs, not poisons or fake medicine. In addition, it is pretty common that staff in the herb station made mistakes. He had to prevent it. I suggested my daughter alter work in town clinic. I told her that she might be able to get some valuable herbs such as “Bezoar”, or “Goubao[2]”.

To recall the things with my mother is not to remember the old things with her. Any today in history is the history of today. Many ways used by mother that she could not explained clearly by herself, show meaningful today. The reason that I tried to talk about the Chinese medicine with the prescription, is to try my best to keep the objective.

What is real in the world? It is not my dissertation, my comment or my conclusion. I only want to express the things as much as possible with the original way and leave it for the readers to analyze and to make conclusion. Also, the reason that I use this way to talk about the Chinese medicine is that I prefer imaging. I also believe that the information in imaging is more comprehensive or of holographic.

I noticed that, my mother paid much attention to the image in patient’s dream, when she was in clinic work. When a patient told “a lot of dream”, “scared dream”, she would ask the exact content of the dream. This is because the weak signal of a disease is commonly showing to the person through the dream. Why the brain has the ability to perform logic reasoning and at the same time choose to express representative image in human dream” For example, you may accept a job that you evaluated good for your future, but in your dream, you may dreamed you drive a plane with confused hands and feet, without clear mind to drive. This dream expressed out your inner emotional status completely.

When my daughter was three or four years of old, I did not know if I should expect her little bit obey or independent. I then had a dream. I dreamed my daughter crawled into a cabinet of tiger in a zoo. I dreamed her touch the sleeping tiger. I dared not to call her loudly. I called her with low voice, but she did not care my calling… This dream showed out my worry and confusion in my education for her.  

When she was in teenage, she expressed out some characteristic of modern youth. I met confusion again. But this time, the meaning of the image in the dream remained unknown for me for a long time. I dreamed I had a big white silver ear ring in my right ear. It makes me bothered since I need to go to work everyday. I tried to take it off, but failed. I wanted to cover it, failed again. Later, I have to go out with it pending with confidence, pretending “I am beauty, I like it.” This dream made me feel baffling. My daughter heard this dream. She told me with tapping on my shoulder: “Mother, do I make you really so worry?” I realized it suddenly, understand its meaning.

Theory can only give us reasoning, but image could send us all information including feelings. Our brain works as a highly sensitive monitor. It reactions to many mild movements in the body inside in the life. It does not report to us by a dissertation all of these information it scanned. It even tries to avoid the reasoning that we learned and saved in our consciousness, but shows it out with imaging figures. What’s its meaning by doing this way?

Chapter 65

In previous years, I saw that my mother was not so serious when see a patient. If the neighbors, close or far away, came for consulting, she even did not feel their pulse, asked me to fold herbs for them. It left me very deep impression. It makes me feel that the practice in Chinese medicine is very simple. Now I understand, it does not mean that the Chinese medicine is simple, but that she knew those neighbors very well. This is just the advantage of the family doctor system practiced in the western world.  

After annual physical exam for this year, one colleague run into my office, crying she got a heart disease, lifting CEG report in her hands. I was very nervous when heard her crying. I was not nervous for her heart disease, but that she would make big fuss in the treatment. Her body was under a weak and fragile balance. Any treatment could break down this balance, making her really sick. The CEG showed blood insufficiency. But she did not have any loss of blood, how it became not enough so suddenly? If such imbalance of Qi and Blood was not due to the lack of blood, it would then be due to the relative more of Qi. This made me thought about the culture and gymnastic activity in our company recently. It is somehow too hard for her, who almost never had physical exercise. But I could not tell out this reason, other wise she would refuse exercise forever. I needed to find other reasons. I asked: “Did you eat Chinese date recently?” She said: “Yes. Half pound every day. I have already had one big box. Is that due to the too much date eating?” I told her stop to eat the date, care for rest and repeat the CEG after one week. Another colleague came to me with a lab test report. He said his blood cholesterol level increased. I asked him what he eaten recently. He said he ate many tinned fishseeds. I said, you have already had your gallbladder removed. How can you bear such much fishseeds? Stop to have it. Wait for one week and check the cholesterol again. Later, the reports for both them were normal.

Nowadays, we are used to regard the disease as a disaster coming outside. We think that it is the doctors’ job to find the reason, rather than ours. In fact, we can find the reasons for many diseases by ourselves by such tracing the reason to its roots.

The child of one of my friend studied in another city. One day, the should called and said the child got paralysis. The hospital there could not treat it. The school was sending the child, by ambulance to a hospital in the provincial capital. The couple of my friend was scared to stunned. They were hurry to that provincial hospital too. They called me on their way about this. Considering that they had no any relatives there, they had no clear mind, and I also feared to delay the treatment for the child, I went to them with the next train.

Used all high technology detections, various lab test, nothing was found wrong. The teacher said the child catch this paralysis, after explosion under rain, during military training course for all new enrolled students. The child went to bed then could move at all. I saw that there was no any red or swelling in the child body, I asked if he had strong body attack with other students. He thought for a while, then answered: yes. He was running, and collided with another one who run from in front of him. That child fall down. All other students went to help that one. He was not fall but collided against a tree. He felt numb in whole body at that time. I found the doctors and told them this story. They came asked the child again, then they invited an acupuncturist, had the child had acupuncture treatment for twenty time. The child was well cured.  

My daughter said: in the internal department of the western medicine, the doctor who has had training in Chinese medicine has advantage than those who has only western medicine training. In early years, I denied my mother’s life style. I thought that she was not in the main stream of the society. She had no social reputation. She was pure, young, not know the society, lack of social experience… However, after went through the most of my life in the society, I basically deny my own social value. Recent days, one of my friends brought her sun, who just graduated from university and started job. My friend wanted me to give her sun a “political lesion”, and told him the hiding rule in the society. When my daughter was young, whenever I asked her to do something, she would ask me why. Every time I told her, it is mot that I want her to do so, but the society wants every of its members to do so. We all are trying to adapt the society. We think it is normal to do so even we need to pay lot of cost. It seems that without doing so, we cannot live or cannot be a member of the society. However for me, I hold a lot of such social experience in my abdomen, when I turn back to have a look, I need to ask, are all these social experience real learning?   

If there is no comparison with my mother, I would not at all doubt my experience in living and in social conversions. Several days ago, in a professional conference, all of us felt that such social experience are very valuable. However my mother lived her whole life, without any social experience, not knowing any social hiding rule, even had no any intention for self protection. She lived in calm and peace. Even in the most dark time of “Cultural Revolution”, when my father was picked up, beaten, and tortured, at least for the reason that his family occurrence belongs to landlord, she herself opened private clinic but had no any trouble. Is it very strange?   Is the social experience really valuable, and useful? Now, I thought, mother’s life was also social, and it was real social. She practiced medicine but never hang advertising board. She depends on her good skill, good reputation and the referral from patients.

People in every social level, in every age, came to her. She was almost their family doctor. She clinic was similar to the current “community clinic”. How can we say that her relationship with others was not a social relationship? The society that was constructed with such social relationship endured the pushing of the “Cultural Revolution”, whereas in our current society, what we have is more cold relationship.

Compared with my mother, how many value of my social experience and how much necessary it is? That I support my daughter to learn Chinese medicine, is also for reason that, I don’t want her as me, learned a lot of social experience, spend a lot of clever mind, but only get a living in society. In fact, human life does not need all of these. But when I was young, I learned all of these as learn a class, and believed that it is true things. My mother only paid attention to her Chinese medicine. She could live well. She did not know any reasoning or rationing for business, not that personal relationships… She was not cheated, or scared, no any conflict in medicine. Her social relationship was stable, solid, true, natural and safe. Her root was in the ordinary people. Therefore, she never felt the society as complex, as dangerous. She did not feel the bitter of people’s heart. This made her pure and simple. No matter how my father explained to my mother that the society was how complex, the heart of people was how hard to feel, my mother appeared no feeling and any action to protect herself. I felt however my father was right. I intended to protect myself, and kept such learning forever. Now, when I turn back to have a look, I found that if the social relationship was not established on human being basis, nor a natural basis, we would be able to feel safe, no matter how we try to protect.  

My mother help others with her ability, she was also help by others for all of her life. Her relationship with others was not established on the basis of money. For people who afford the treatment, they would pay for it. For people who cannot afford, or for people who was old, of for child who came by himself, there was no money charged. If she heard that someone was sick, she would send me to have a look. She not only went to the home, but also send some fruits to the patients. I said my mother had three masters.  She told me the first and the third masters do not care money. The second somehow preferred money and had money too. But his sun died of pot smoker. My mother did not leave money to us. Her tress or food was not better than others. It was common that some people send her gift. At that time, the most common gift were fruits, cake, or tinned food, and so on. However, she never allowed my brothers and me to touch it. I remembered one time, my mother did not allow my senior brother to eat a cake. For this, my grandmother cared her grandson, blamed my mother, and brought her grandson on street to buy a sesame seed cake for him. I always send such things, for the name of my mother, to old people in various homes. Before I grow up into adult, I never ate a whole apple. We always shared apple. One quarter of apple would be eaten by me with teeth scratching for a long time. The taste was so nice.

Chapter 66

Because when I was young, I had to carry water, carry fire-sticks. Long time labor work made my spine into a curve shape. Under X ray film, it looks as a “S” shape. I jeered at it, and said, curve tree is also a tree. Curve tree can live too. If it is corrected straight, it would be damaged to die. Little bit more than ten years ago, when I walk, I was collided by a very strong man. I was stick to the wall, hardly to move at all. I stood for a long while to start move again and walked slowly home. From that time, the left side of my body is not smooth. Especially for the left arm, it was numb and weak. Later it lost feeling to pain or temperature. I believed it was due to that collision, that made something wrong to my curved spine that had original problem already. Since I saw that the result for the treatment of cervical spondylosis is not satisfied, in addition to the fact that I was very busy at that years, the problem was delayed for six to seven years. One time in a hospital, I had my blood taken. The nurse is a new one. She tried for three times but failed. So she felt kind of worry. I advised her not to feel worry, but repeat it slowly. I said that my arm did not feel any pain actually, so she had no need to feel worry. One doctor who past us criticized me: “You are really ridicule. She has already hurry for not success. You jeered at her by this way, than directly blame her.” I cried you mistaken me. I said my arm indeed had no feeling at all. It was as a wood almost… The doctor felt strange. He asked me what was wrong with it. I said it was cervical spondylosis. He said, it is a joke. You patient can name new terms by yourself. How could a cervical spondylosis have such symptom? He checked me all over and believed that I got a tumor in brain, asked me to have CT scan. The cost for CT at that time was very expensive, so I refused. I opposed him: “If the tumor is in brain, how it stops growth for six to seven years?” He felt my words reasonable, so he said: well, you don’t need to check furthermore here. I am the top expert here. You need to seek higher level expert. He wrote a name for me, asked me to see another doctor in another city and bring the result back him.  

After half year, I had a chance to find this expert, during my business trip. His diagnosis is: hollow in spine. My friend who came with me asked him, is this problem treatable? The expert said, it is heard that it can be treated. Heard this, I knew there was no hope. My friend again asked, what would happen after continuous development? The expert said, of course paralysis. My friend wanted to ask something again, I pulled her out of the hospital. I said, what do you want to ask? You did not find that it was a disease hardly treated? From that time, I prepared to live in a paralysis condition. Upon the winter the year before last year, the skin in my left arm started to have ulcer, muscle shrink, necrosis in nails, then the fingers hardly to move, to bend or to stretch. My friends felt very pity: it is so pity for your beauty fingers. Now you cannot attend the competition for “Beauty Fingers”. My daughter performed acupuncture to me. She told me that the profession in the nervous department of her university said, such condition would be only maintained not to further development, but not cured. I knew from my heart. It can only be maintained, not improved. Seeing that my beauty fingers became a claw as animal, I pretended a brave spirit to accept the science truth.  

One day, one of my friends got sick. I brought her to see my daughter’s master. He saw my fingers, asked what’s wrong, and insisted to have a treatment by him. He soon started prescription. I smiled: “Well, my case is also a kind of difficult case. You can do experiment on me, to explore how to solve this problem.” My daughter’s master felt unhappy right away: “Why you said I am doing experiment with you? Chinese medicine never believe a disease is nor curable or hard to treat. Whichever way it needs for the treatment, it should be used in that way. If the method matches the disease, no disease is not reversible”.

Though I did not wish to cure my problem, consider the need to delay the development of the disease, I agreed to drink his herbal tea. He asked me to prepare the herbs into powder. I felt it is bothering to eat the powder. So I make them into pills with honey. I ate two pills every day. I thought, so severe disease, how such two pills could work? I kept taking the pill for almost one year. The shrink of the arm muscle was stop. The lost muscle came back mostly. My fingers can stretch, close. Now I can practice sound finger as used in the Spanish dance.

Some people said that, to be able to cure the hard and complex disease is the last excuse for Chinese medicine. I thought, those of diseases that are believed hard to cure by western medicine becomes curable in the Chinese medicine. Is it making us not feel mysterious sometimes? For this, my daughter said, there is originally no mystery. One hundred years ago, no matter what disease that was cured by the Chinese medicine, we feel it is normal and natural. Only compared with the western medicine, the Chinese medicine appears mysterious from time to time.  

Currently, the diseases that are termed hard to cure by the western medicine has been described in the Chinese medicine literatures before. In the treatment, there are also rules and formulas to follow. How it should be hard? I laughed: in this way, the mystery of the Chinese medicine is termed by the western medicine? Daughter said yes. Without comparison, neither side is mysterious. After her explanation, I accepted the fact with easy that my “claw” turns back to “beauty fingers” again.

My daughter’s master studies the bible level literatures in Chinese medicine everyday. In his eyes, my condition belongs to “Pianku[1]”. Independent of the term “spine hollow syndrome”, he used herbs to nourish my blood and Qi, loss meridians, not thinking about whatever disease in the spine. Though my arm is controlled by the spine, I cannot prevent, when I moved my arm smoothly and freely, from thinking that the leader is of course to lead the follower. If the follower arm moves actively, would also create active stimulation to the spine?

My daughter’s master is very dignity. It makes him slightly away form the main stream of thinking, so to be able to keep some nature characteristic in the Chinese medicine. Though he also used western medicine terms to explain disease for patients, it is to arm him self, for the sake to have proper communication with patient. In his bone, he is still Chinese medicine doctor. 

Chapter 67

For any question, if it is so difficult to augur, if it is returned into its exist, it would not be so hard to find its reasoning to exist. The nature of Chinese medicine, its co-operation between patient and doctor, its prediction, simplicity, natural, cheep, used by ordinary people, charity, equality, etc., all not completely determined by the medical nature of the Chinese medicine, but determined by its existing rule that formed during thousands of years its road to presence and to develop. The Chinese medicine is not officer-used medicine, it has never been supported by the government. The presence of Chinese medicine of course will have its reality reason to exist. Such reality reason does not disappear even to today.

The independency of Chinese medicine can supply many valuable references for the development of current medical system. The Chinese medicine continued to correct its relationship with the reality, seeking the best combination with the reality, so to gain its life. Through the expressing of the Chinese medicine in the three generations of my family, it is clear the reason for the fall backward of the Chinese medicine, and for the difference between the Chinese medicine and the western medicine. Human life is not only the life of one person, but also a continuous life of generations, such as my mother, mine and my daughter’s.  

When we put the life of one person into the continuous lives of generations, many personal characteristics and many occasional factors start to show a common characteristic and necessary. Even many minor case could imply to current people valuable information. If we don’t close our eyes, not only stick to the science technology, the knowledge and wisdom obtained by observation of life carefully may not be less than by science.

I have a friend who deny the wisdom of woman. I asked him smiling: did you think that the wisdom of human being comes only from the gene of father, not from mother either? The gene of mother is only a hollow shell? He asked: the man depends on the society and science to develop wisdom, what woman depends on? I said: woman depends on observation and feeling. In history, women with wisdom was usually regarded as witch. When I see this word “巫” in Chinese, I felt kind and warm and felt it bears philosophy meaning. This Chinese character looks similar to human brain, with left and right half of brain. One side represents the inner human and another side represents the outside human… When my mother was alive, she teach me Qigong. When I have trouble in the body, she would ask me to “hold a mount of Qi”. I had asthma when I was young. Since I felt hard to breath, I had to practice the Qigong breath. Later, when I got trauma and spine hollow syndrome with severe pain, I also used Qigong to release the pain. Later I also find that the Qigong has a function of release emotion. Whenever I met some emotional conflict which appears hard to solve, I would sit for a while with a mouth of Qi in the mouth. Then, I felt the Qigong could open a meeting room in my heart, allowing every part sit down for a meeting. Then you would find that the components of self were very complex.  My daughter asked me how complex it is. I made an example to her. When she was young, one time she was very naughty, which made me very angry. I pulled her to me and wanted to beat her. But my arm suddenly felt spasm in the air, couldn’t fall down. My daughter, who was originally scared, could not prevent from laugh by seeing this. Later I explained to her, my grandmother was very cruel. She beaten child very heavy. My mother was kind. She did not beat child. When I saw my daughter naughty, the gene in my body that came from my grandmother orders me to list arm to beat, but the gene from my mother asked me not to do so. In my heart, since I did not beat the child, I felt angry against my mother’s part. So and so, the conflict in my heart made me beaten my self on my head

To release my inner conflict, I had to sit, holding a mouth of air in mouth, opening an emotional room, allowing my grandmother and my mother have dialogue. As the way usually mother advised my grandmother with soft matter, in my heart, the part of my mother would advise my grandmother stop angry. If I do not create a chance for them to have a democracy meeting, though they have died for many years, their conflict continued in my body. If I omit their conflict, they would use my body as war field. In a war, beside the both sides in the war, the most damage might be for the field, not to speak of the situation that they both have become part of my body? How severe my loss would be?

If our understanding to life is simple, the spacecraft we launched to the Mars would return without any finding. If our understanding to life is deeper and deeper, we would need to launch spacecraft to the Mars again and again.

That Chinese medicine is not the main stream of medicine system, is also the reason to deny it by some people. Such denying something with its result is too simple. 

Chinese people think things as it favorite time. This time is not proper for this thing, it would be good for other thing. If it is not good time for other thing, it would be good for this thing. The time and space co-exist. Every time there is a disease for that time. The disease is associated with the main stream. For example, we all feel unhappy to the current main stream education system, but is there any no-main stream education system? Who can start a second education system? Even a small “Mother class” cannot be endured by the main stream education system. I have had tried to change the way of teaching in class. But student stood up and told me, teacher, the class should not be touched as such. Who can stop their children to school, Mrs. Zheng Yuanjie against << Education Law >>? My daughter tapped my shoulder and said: young person need to be as a container, to store knowledge and fertilizing thinks; when they become old, they start to secrete thinks, “when the libido is full, it would spill by it self”. At this old age, it is needed to make a tube for them to export thinks.

From my mother to my daughter, Chinese medicine went a big curve back in my family. Some times, I daughter criticized me that this curve is too big. If my mother’s experience can be passed to me, my daughter would be able to stand on other’s shoulder (to be excellent Chinese medicine doctor). But the Chinese medicine was stop as a plane land. I feel very guilty in my heart.

As Chinese, I feel guilty to my old generations. To correct my mistake, I can only try my best to describe out my memory to Chinese medicine in my young age, to make it reference to my daughter. If it can inspire others, would my guilty feeling less?

Chapter 68

When my mother was seeing a patient, if my father was also at presence, he might make some naughty some times. He would encourage patients to accept the new scientific technique treatment in the western medicine. He got some terramycin tablets. He told me not to drink Guizhi Tang[1], but take the tablet. One time, there came a patient with dark color face. My mother felt strange for the dark color on his face and she was unable to find the reason. My father saw it. He chatted with the patient, asking his job, etc. Then he brought a basin of water and a piece of soap. He asked this man wash his face. After twice washing, his face was much bright. The reason for his dark face was that, his work was to burn coal tar. Every, he washed his face not completely. For a long time, the face looked dark. For this thing, my father felt pleased with himself, laughed at Chinese medicine, and bloated his adjustment to me.  

Now, the way of some people against the Chinese medicine, to me, looks as the way of my father before. But my mother advised me to drink some Guizhi Tang anyway. Mother asked me to have an observation: the use of western medicine usually suppressed the Yangqi in the body. She feared that my surface disease would change into inside problem after taking the western medicine.

I feel that the value of the Chinese medicine is to supply a view to look at the western medicine. The contribution of Chinese culture to the world culture is the same way.

Does the western medicine or western culture need another view to look at it? Why when it is talked about the western and eastern culture, there is only either admire or belittle? If I say that my motion to study the Chinese medicine is to explore and study the jade of western science, is it ok? If I say that I polish a Chinese diamond bit, is to carve the western chinaware, is it ok? If there was no a mother of Chinese medicine, but only a father of chasing for science, I may not, for whole of my life, get a view to assess the current science.

How could we say that to assess the science is understand to throw away the science? The western science and Chinese medicine in my family is my father and my mother. It is very difficult for me to separate the scientific spirit from my father, not to separate the traditional culture with my mother. No one can make a decision to chose one and throw anther, nor push them devoice.

If I lose my parents’ culture, I still have another choice, that is my grandmother’s folk philosophy. My grandmother believed that marriage was bigger than one man and one woman. Though the world view of my father and my mother is different, under that domination of my grandmother, they got married anyway and had four children. That professor, who asked to sign to delete Chinese medicine, why not first get devoice with his Chinese medicine wife? Therefore, as correct as my grandmother said, nothing is more important than to live.

The competition between the Chinese medicine and the western medicine, and that between the Chinese culture and the western culture, all ask the occurrence of a bigger culture that can unite them two. That I talk about the Chinese medicine through talking about my mother and my daughter, is for the reason that I believe the feeling is the root. Feeling and the reasoning is the root each other. None can stand alone. If there is only feeling, there would no way to describe. If there is only reasoning but no feeling, it would be as an alien. It would also be hard to talk with an alien, since the nature of language and the culture is to “quote out of context”, leaving lot of space.

When we teach child in essay, the simple way is to make a short or omitted description for the things that are well known by people in current time. But this does not work for aliens. They are out of human world, not experience any time of human life generation. Therefore, they have no perception to many human “theory”, cannot understand things that are well known by current human being on the earth. So, the metal plate we send to the universe, to them, is a picture, not words.

Scientist Hua Luogen suggested to send the ancient Chinese picture “Blue-Red come in and out” to them. I recommend to send them the Yin-Yang and Ba-Gua. Why the human civilization would be summarized in this plate as image or imagination? On the earth, in current times, we produced some “earth aliens”. They do not adjust their time –space position, not to build time-space “hollow”, not to study those things that are well known by many other human being. They cannot understand traditional culture, feel hard to understand many current things. They sit down there waiting to adjust things. The hold an one inch long logic, to adjust this is not correct and that is not correct either. Contrary to the children’ one inch logic, the logic of these “earth aliens” is away from the reality of the earth. Looking from the Chinese medicine, they got the disease of time-space disorder. Only aliens can ask human being split the feeling and the reasoning. Under current condition when the reasoning is overwhelming, to return the feeling is to re-chose the reasoning based on the root feeling. This is the Chinese way of cultural adjusting by returning the root.

Return, is not only the way of some fish and birds. It is needed for human in spirit to return to its root, so to start new spring. Chinese care the importance of the time and the space relationship. It is not only the need in the Chinese medicine for disease treatment, but also in the Chinese prediction. If we learned  the change of the time and space, it would not be so hard to understand the thinking of the ancient Chinese. If there is no understanding of the knowledge in different time and in different environment, how could we have a thoroughly master of human knowledge? 

To kill the other culture by the name of science, is to make the science wear a bad reputation. It is not the correct way to love the science. The current logic in criticizing is separate people into right or wrong, wisdom or foolish, good or bad, dignity or lowly. It is actually to exclude the others and make comments. Therefore, we can see in the scholar discussion, there is full of laugh at, blame, rant and rave. From beginning, I thought it is an education level of a person. Later, I realized that it is the question of a logic. The big mistake of this logic is that it does not respect people, denies the value of human life and the significance of the life. How could a theory that is correct be against the human being? 

When I was 12 years of old, I followed my father to countryside to live. My father advocated the use of scientific way of farming, by using high quality seeds and fertilizer and by using agricultural mechanization. I saw by my self the course my father guided them. In fact these young persons in the countryside were very clever. The role of my father is to inspire them. My father, who kept laugh at Chinese medicine, when he inspired the interest of these young persons in the medicine, what he used is a model of ear, and the herbal books he steal from my mother! Started from the ear acupuncture and herbal therapy, he encouraged two girls as the “barefoot doctor” in the village, to use the most simple way to treat the simple disease first. At this time, why my father did not encourage the use of western medicine? The reason is: no money! His seeder machine is made of wood! Father asked some land from the team leader. He asked the “barefoot doctor” planted some herbs. I helped them to collect some herbs.

My father described to me the future society of human. He said there would have the development of the material and the spirit two aspects. The development of material is very fast, but the spiritual aspect is very slow. For example, he predicted, the Chinese character will be simplified, Pingyin formatted, then into a world language – the whole world speak the same language. At that time, there would be some people who dedicate themselves to the creation of the world language. 

Father said, the world language is neither the perfect one. The best one would be mathematics. In future society, everyone is mathematician. Why his prediction does not work? It is an interesting thing.

Chapter 69

When we talk about Chinese medicine, the opponents mentioned it with witch and forture-teller. If this is a correct logic, when we mention a leader, we should regard him a corrupt official. When we mention a judge, we comment him might be a corrupt officer too. This is another logic to create “angry youth”. However, even for the future-teller, there are different styles: the “scholar style” and the “wild life”. They are not the same. The scholar style was created and studied by those of ancient Chinese who were most clever; the “wild life” style continued to use the study results into the practice. They worked together and help each other in the development. 

If we look the “scholar” style future-teller, its nature is actually philosophy. I not only not look down the witch in the ancient times, but also keep study attitude to the Chinese culture of ghost and supernatural beings. Even for the witch in the current time, I do not simply deny them. Many years ago, one of my friends told me, the wife of one of her friend was a witch. She cared some kind of “pseudo-disease” for people, from time to time. One day after a classmate meeting, her husband drunk a lot. Friend send him home. His wife can not only tell out the number of the man and woman in the party, but also the number of the wine bottles they drunk. The friend said, it was very strange, that the wife was a common house woman. When she talk, however, her realization to the things was very high level and spoke on the spot. When my friend talked this tome, we were walking on street. She pointed out one house on the side of the road and said she was to visit a friend in that house, and wanted me to accompany.

After we came in, we saw several people were already there. My friend pointed to one of the woman and introduced that she was that witch. Now I understood that she brought me here to have an assessment on this witch. My friend introduced me to the witch: “This is my friend, would you please see what matter is with her now?” The witch said: “I don’t need to see for her. She knows what’s matter she has”. I smiled: “I am not a witch, how do I know?” The witch said: “You did not find that, when you gave people a suggestion or gave them an idea, it worked well?” I cried loudly with being injustice that it was the result of my study and learning, no relationship with witch. The witch told my friend: “Her mother was also a doctor”. My friend looked at me surprisingly: “Your mother is also a witch?” Before I said anything, the witch said: “Her mother graduated from standard school.” I said: “Since she graduated from school, there would have nothing with the witch”. The witch said: “Well, if there was no any relationship, how her healing result was so good, without any medical accident?” Heard this, I opposed: “If it is a witch see patient, it is enough to have people as you, why she need to study hard for so many years?” The witch said: “There are many people studying hard too, but not everyone can really master the sill, neither everyone can exercise the job and working for a super-nature.”  I smiled: “If you change the spiritual nature of human being into an image as a super-nature, I would not oppose you. But the question that I want to ask you is: if you have no technique but only the good heart to help people, how you can serve your super-job?” The witch pointed to all the persons in the room: “In deed I have nothing, but when I help people, is it not that I have nothing?” I asked: “Would you think that you are cheating?” She said: “I don’t feel that I am cheating you. Do you feel that I am cheating you?” I smiled. I surely not felt she was cheating me, but felt that I met a wisdom, listening to whom is worthwhile than reading ten years of book.

My friend said: “What you are talking about? I almost cannot understand. Please talk about some reality things”. She asked the witch: “Tell me, do you think that my friend may find a new husband or new partner?” The witch said: “Would not”. My friend asked: “Why?” The witch said: “Because there is a male snake in her body occupying her, not allow any other man close to her.” My friend and I laughed. Though I laughed what she said pretty ridiculous, but she could make a very clear image summery of a complex psychology factors. This is very interesting. In fact, that my friend could not understand the words that came from a common woman, is due to the limitation of the current thinking model. Now I remembered the program host of Chinese television station << Half Sky >>. She was surprised to the countryside farm woman, Mrs. Liu Xiao, who has no any block to communicate with her. This is the same situation as this friend. We always believe that knowledge can only come from book, school, teacher, do not know the human is a learning animal. It can learn from inside too. The wisdom as the plants on the land, it can grow naturally in natural environment. Nothing strange. The current learning model and manner makes us used to look the ordinary people from high position down.

Compared with today, the early development of human being, is commonly and naturally believed low, primitive, passive, simple. Where would have super-nation with them? We now try to clear any remaining primitive things from our body. I don’t know our history of human face with snake tail. We cannot only keep the head but not the tail.

One of my friends vividly described our current development is a man with paralysis lower body drives a electric car. Our current presence status is as an adult. We can only say his reality of development, but not the possibility of development when he was a baby. We adult lost how many possibility of development? But we proudly look the child there naïve and innocent. I not only believe that the “Human maker” was not lazy, but also that the evolution goes completely without leaving not-finished residue. Those we omitted the feeling level things, so called low level of us, and those we are trying to get rid of, might be the most important things. The decision through the natural ability, rather than through a reasoning, might be the best and wisdom one. Some things, that were denied by science, thrown away by reasoning, contain surprising wisdom. They imply again and again much bigger logic than the science that we have already had in hand.  

Chapter 70

One time, I was in a flood. I struggled for two hours without any hope to touch land. I had to consider my body power, ready to accept to die to the bottom of the river. Then, I saw a very huge dark red ball running in front of me – it is a ball of many ants. They hold each other into a ball. To avoid drowned for those ants that touched the water, the ant ball rolled continuously, from inside to the outside, clock-wised… I was stunned. The age of the ant is not long. Not to speak of an individual, even for ten or hundred of the ant generations might not be able to meet such heavy flood. Where they got this knowledge to survive? If I pick up one ant from this ant ball, ask it how it knows? You can say that they did so is due to instinct, and by chance. But the way they used to protect the species is not science? The wisdom is so much great over the ants, that they handle themselves to the fate by instinct, which appeared to be the most wisdom way. Therefore, to give oneself to the fate sometimes might not be a passive action. When I was in the flood, realized that there was a logic that is bigger than individual and than the science, I felt more energy that made me survived.

I talked so much, someone might say that I still did not talk out what is Chinese medicine. I know that the amount of knowledge in Chinese medicine can not be compared with the western medicine. Every term, my daughter brought back the western medicine textbooks, every of which was thick as a brick. In deed, there was no so much books in Chinese medicine. I said before, the storage space and the searching power in human brain is not better than the “Deep Blue” computer. Once the searching ability of a doctor’s brain is not enough, there might be a medical accident.

I studied very carefully a medical accident case. This was very good doctor. However, due to the lack of knowledge and the limitation of his searching ability, he has mistake in assessment, causing medical accident. In the meeting of the medical assessment committee, he was questioned, blamed, even laughed at. I thought, these experts had higher title than him, older than him, more experience than him. They are a group. What they did is the “clever after happened”. How they had no any understanding to a doctor working in community hospital?

In big hospital, there always are many doctors consulting for one patient, not including the large amount of detection or test machines and the operation stuff for these machines yet. Does this not mean that the western medicine knowledge cannot be remembered all by the brain of one person? Therefore, why western medical doctors tend to be in a group, whey they tend to work in a big hospital, why they depend on high technology technique, why people tend to go to big hospital for healthcare, are all not clear? People want to go to Beijing so to feel they did all they can do. What kind of medical facility can get becomes the standard to separate the social levels. It is in deed the technique logic determines the thinking logic of people.

The study period for medical university is five years, longer than ordinary university. Along with the development of the medicine, and when the medical knowledge double, how can we learn the western medicine? We know, that in western countries, the medical student needs to learn ten years before they can see a patient independently. Would it be prolonged to twenty years, or thirty years? Will it happen that the student graduates at 50 years of old, then six to seven doctors see a patient? Or, just develop a robot that can work as a doctor for the diagnosis and treatment?

I admit that the knowledge in the western medicine is very “solid”. As comparison, the knowledge and technique in the Chinese medicine is less. The learning in the Chinese medicine is kind of “not solid”, “not concrete”. After I lived for the fifty years, I realized the usefulness of the “not solid”. When I was young, I tried to learn the technique, tried to occupy the knowledge. When I become older, I however try to pay less attention to the technique and knowledge. My profession is lawyer, but now I try not to use law, e.g. not to use my professional knowledge to solve problem. I try to make my inner “void”. I let the things that I faced into my inner side as whole, not being

The ancient Chinese compared the “void” status as a lake of water. After a could or bird flies over, there would be its shallow on the water. It is used to explain that, with coming of things, there is feeling in the heart; after away of the things, there is nothing left in the heart. Therefore, the Chinese medicine is the “void” without any thing in it. The third master of my mother, paid much attention to the “void” status in heart and in the Chinese medicine. One day, when he explained the “void” to my mother, my father was presence. Later when my father mentioned this to me, he said, indeed, there is nothing in the Chinese medicine. The “void” is to cheat people. It is to flicker, to do things according to current condition, and to do things without principle… I agreed completely with my father.

Now I know, it is not hard to learn technique, and to learn knowledge. It is however very hard for current people to master this “void”. Our heart has been filled up in solid. It makes our original sense, the hearing, the smelling, the feeling, etc. all regressed.

One time, I accompanied two colleagues to find another colleague. I saw him coming, so I was very happy. These two colleagues laughed at me too short-sighted, that I can regard a stranger as colleague. After that man coming close, I have a look, it is indeed not my colleague. But I do not feel satisfied. Since I was short-sighted, I recognize people not by face but by body shape. The body shape of this man appeared is my that colleague. So I came to that man, asked him if he know my colleague. The man said: “He is my older brother”

The year before last year, my uncle came to see me. We did not see each other for 25 years. I brought my nephew to meet him in railway station. I told my nephew the characteristics of my uncle. I told him, even if the chance that I recognized him is fifty percent, the chance that he recognized me is also fifty percent. All together, it would be hundred percent. But my uncle passed us, did not recognize me, neither did I recognize him. But after out of the station, my uncle recognized my daughter. This made me very strange. My daughter looks like her aunt, but I looks like my grandmother. How my uncle recognized my daughter? My uncle saw my daughter and said: “How only you come to see me?” My daughter answered: “They are inside the station.” Then she called me: “Your uncle is here.”

Chapter 71

Recently, one of my friends told me her sorry thing to me, that has been a burden on her heart for 20 years, that she and her sun both got type B hepatitis. She send this to me by text through cellular phone. I did not answer it. She asked if I am upset, not give her pardon? I returned to her: would the hepatitis influence friendship? If by chance my child got it, would she never tell me? Her sun usually ate and lived in my home when he was young. He was almost as a child of my home. She said she felt very heavy burden since when another of my friends, who also had hepatitis, ate at my home, I gave her separated bowls and tablespoons, etc. When I invited friends at home, I usually prepared server-self dinner. So, she did not mention at her disease and pretended as same as me. She excused that, according to her experience, the type B hepatitis does not transfer to others through sharing common tools for meal. Her evidence is that her husband, and the husband of my another friend were not transferred for this hepatitis. I was very upset for her excuse.

Her way made me feel sorry to my daughter, so I told her and repeated what my friend excused. My daughter however was pretty generous and accepted her excuse. She asked me: “Do you know why the two husbands were not transferred?” I really don’t know why her husband, who ate and slept together with his wife with type B hepatitis for twenty years but were not transferred. My daughter reminded me: “Think about the personality of your friends and their husbands?”

Those two of my friends are both type A personality. They insist, careful, asking exact, quick action, chase for perfect. If one of them wants me to buy something from market, I have to change my own personality into the type A temporally. I need to have a look of the whole market first, than chose the one that is perfect in shape, color, package and so on. When the seller measures the weight, I need to push out my head to see if the measurement is correct. If I buy the same thing for my self, I will not pay too much mind do this way.  One New Year’s Eve, the sun of one of them came to my home for help. He violated the discipline of computer bar and feared penalty by his parents. I padded my chest that it would not. In the New Year’s Eve, even the most cruel landlord before, would treat the slave kind. But the second day, the child showed me his wound that was beat by his parents. It made me very angry and had quarrel with them. I did not see any parents not so lenient. But their husbands were very kind, lenient, no resentment. My daughter said, those of my friends were very easy to get upset and not consent, how could their livers were good? On the other side, their husbands are not as their wife. If they really had liver disease, with no more than one month, the disease would be improved well. Her explanation made me laugh. In this case, people deserved their own disease.  

Due to the nature of our work, people in our company, especially those who are the leaders, are mostly type A persons. I know the work of us needs such type A person. My slogan is: “Follow and allow their intention. Let them A and more A!” So, in my computer, there are several samples of self-criticism. Once there is any conflict with the leader, I would first of all medicate, then write a self-criticism for the sake of my colleague, hand it to the leader. Think about it: the type A person asks more in the job. They bear heavy emotional stress on their liver. If they got angry with others, they would be hurt much more. How dangerous it would be to their body!

Therefore, such a single sheet of self-criticism is the herbal formula for the liver Fire. The work need all to do. But there are always someone who worked more critical, more careful, and more strict, so spend more of their bodies. The only several times of over ordinary performance of mine were all pushed under the persons with the type A personality. It is hard to keep the working speed of them, so it is needed to prepare several sheets of self-criticism.

One day, I made a series of humor film with computer. All laughed after looking, but the leader felt very angry. I was hurry to write a self-criticism and handed over to him. If this self-criticism was read out, it would be heard as a comic dialogue. But he did not laugh but read it carefully. He felt that my self-criticism was very critical and serious. He had hepatitis too.

Type A person works under high pressure. They would not feel it after a long time. In summer vacation, my daughter came to my company to see me. One of my male colleague asked her to feel his pulse. My daughter said his pulse suggested damage of his body libido (Yuan Qi). She insisted asking the reason. My colleague said he did not have any surgical operation, nor tuberculosis. He just has had an annual body exam and nothing was found specially wrong. He had distance running every day, perform up-down lifting, and felt nothing wrong. Upon saying, he showed us his strong muscle. But my daughter still closed her eyebrows, thinking the reason. I  advised her, there might be someone who has strong body but weak pulse. My daughter said urgently, it is impossible. If we cannot find the reason, it is as we did not find the mine hidden in the body. It would be very dangerous. It is this kind of person who is easy to get sudden death. Heard of this, I started care too. I reminded my colleague: did you feel tired after searching a escaping criminals?  My colleague said, he had been out for 120 days to find that escaping criminal. He could not eat or sleep in a normal way. The brain nerve was strictly tight. He indeed was very tired. But it is his job. All are doing the same way. My daughter said, such way of working hurt people very much. It is the reason for over-working death. Daughter said, it would be better after finding the reason. She suggested my colleague careful for rest, do not do extreme physical movement…

Recently, a Spanish football player died of sudden heart disease. He was only 22 years of old. How strong his body was! Where comes his heart disease? I though it is due to the damage of sport.  

Chapter 72

My daughter’s father was drunken very day for some period of time. One of his friends was good at drinking and he wanted to let him also drunken and drunken every day. I felt it was not a good thing for him. So I invited this friend in a party to advice him do not continue to inspire my husband. The goy however did not listen to me, but declared no one could stop his “killing” action. No way, so I let my husband wear “Shengong Yuanqi Dai”[1], perform physical therapy, eating herbal diet, and other various health maintenance means. By this way, my husband increased his tolerance to the wine. He not only no longer fall into drunken but also be able to make that guy drunken. The goy did not give up. He tried much more hard to make my husband drunken. Finally one day, the guy fell off stares. Though saved very hard in the hospital, he became a vegetable.  

After the accident, I regretted very much and blamed me. It is my little medical knowledge that hurt him. How can we use the medical knowledge carelessly? Due to self-blame, I went to the hospital to see him often. He lied there as baby. His wife asked me what to do? I said, try to restart his wisdom. On the street, I bought a lot of various toys to him. But he only liked one: cloth doll. This makes me very strange. A man, after loss of social consciousness, what he loved is a doll. It is not correct if we say that he has no social consciousness, since his wife said, when he plays the doll, he would feel shamed if there are any people around. The wardmate in his ward, all are damaged in brain, hardly to express meaning clearly. If he wanted to mention the western, the expression out would however the eastern. He was very angry for people not understand him. One day, he broke things when I came.  All other people hidden aside to see him expressing his emotion. After watched him for a while, I gave him a pen and paper. He drew a cup. All of us felt relax: oh, he wanted to drink. Later when I went to visit him, he showed me what he drew. He drew a lot. He drew better and better. He was no longer angry. It appears that the concept in the human brain is not a stable storage. Its taking-out is easy to get trouble. So, many rock pictures are more as picture, less with words. Maya people in deed left words, but no one can tell out its meaning. When we use our knowledge, when we explore our inner hidden ability, we could not realize the risking component in it; not realize that when one factor varies, many other factor would be varied at the same time; not realized hat this whole variation may not always in harmony, in a nice and health way. This idea not only applies to the social, but also to the body. However the nature of our human is to act thought we know it should not and can not. Science is such thing. It is the development of the human being, but also the tragedy of human being.

The Yin-Yang and Five-element is a model. The progressive decline of  Chinese medicine is due to the disconnect of this model with the reality. It is not so much the model cannot keep the time, as the human being is away from the nature. It is the protection role of the science that makes the human being no longer keep the same step as the nature. Or, we can say that, changing the nature with the science makes the human have no nature to keep step with. I am not worry or feel pity to loss the Yin-Yang and Five-element, but worry that the nature power may later rebound back, to break our protecting shell, draw us back into the nature again? At that time, would we not bring a gold bowl but no food to eat? I know that the Yin-Yang and Five-element model might not perfect, but it however hold one side of the sky. The society develops as an individual department in front, but constructed with many kinds of cultures. Break the Chinese culture, this holding pole to sky, there might be a crash of the sky in that side.

Is it ok if we do not repair that sky? When I went out for a traveling with my daughter, she thought it would be enough to bring enough money. I would bring enough money but also a big cake. My action of bring a big cake would be laughed by young people, the cake might have to be throw away for moldy. But once the human being is still on the way, my job is to bring a big cake with me.  

The year before last year, I followed a group out for traveling. My colleague advised me: “This time, you don’t need to care for anything, but your own fun.” I promised. But when I say the team leader put all of the bank cards, personal certificate cards, so many important thins, into a single small bag, I could not prevent to ask him: “Let me bring the bank card?” The leader asked why. I said, there might be depletion of magnetic from the cards if you put all together. So, he gave the bank cards to me. 

Three days later, his bag was stolen. Since the bank cards were with me, our overall traveling was not really affected. I told my daughter, China is a multiple disaster country, who can ensure that your generation would not catch a war or natural disaster? Without electric, the huge hospital would be a ruin. I never said that the western medicine is not good, never said that we should not develop big hospital, never said no need to bring enough money on traveling, I only asked myself a person who can supply little supplement to the whole course. I would not feel easy if I don’t leave a big cake, my daughter, to the human being. No worry for tens of thousands, but we need to worry by chance. A woman in menopause period is such worry. My daughter criticize me from her young. It appeared that she would not grow up without denying me. I would like to be denied by my daughter.

From my daughter, I realized that history is not to be admired. The God is not to be admired. Its fresh life lives during continuous been denied and confirmed in use. Deny or confirm both has no significance. The significance is the growing of human being. The Chinese medicine is under deny and confirm too. It means that we are growing. That I still feel interested to live, when I am more than 50 years of old, is for the reason that I can still taste out the mystery of the life.

I lived a childhood with the accompany of my mother. After birth of my daughter, I accompanied her. I lived again a childhood viewed from a mother’s point. Then I found, though I believed I have already known things, I actually did not know thing in my early years. My mother, whom I have believed not knowing things from my point, appeared not really so. Then I realized that our childhood is not only one time. When I accompany my grandson for his childhood, would I live another my childhood again, to bring back the nice time as my grandmother accompanied me? History, why it is again and again hammered and pondered? 

Primitive, why it makes people hard to throw away? Why human want to go back to the root? It is because the human does not grow up once, but repeatedly. So, returning does not mean to go back a old road, but a new road. It is to pick up a life that belongs to me. It is to make me toward perfect again and again. In accompanying my daughter, the shape of my mother grew taller and taller, and with dignity and divinity. For this, I understand why Chinese ask to behave as a man, why Chinese respect ancient generations very much. My daughter said: “Mother, after you die, if I want to argue wit, who can replace you?” I felt happy in heart. From the deny by my daughter, I was denied to a position in which no one can replace me. After I die, would my shape be some divinity in my daughter’s heart?  

Chapter 73

One day I met my previous neighbor. I asked about his grandfather’s mother. He said she died. It was in spring. She lived for 98 years. I corrected him, it was not 98, but 103 years of old. Chinese does not want to be the full hundred. The person who said he/she is 98 or 99 years of old most probably has already over 100 years of old. This old lady went to visit my neighbor family ten years ago. She came to visit us one day in the morning. She looked as only 70 years of old. She told me she was old, had one tooth fell. The memory was reduced too. If she went to the street to buy three things, she would then return with only two.

I told her, I was only 40 but lost two teeth already. If I go to the street to buy one thing, I can even forget that one. I was surprised when she told me that she was 93 years of old and she still cook for the whole family. On May first this year, we went to the suburbs to have a volunteer working. I met the grandmother of my colleague. She was also 93 years of old. She lived herself, burning fire, cook, washing clothes. She had many suns and grand suns, but no one could successfully invited her to live with them. Seeing that I picked up a camera to take a photo, she was hurry to make a pose, smiled facing the camera.

From the long-lived people I learned a lot. That people got old does not necessarily cause bothering to others. Old people over 90 can take care his/herself, but also serve the whole family. How nice a picture of family? Many of our current people, when just over some age, want to be cared by others, asking sun or daughter come to visit them, asking material and also feelings. Would it not create burden to the next generation? Whenever I saw the public-benefit advertising on TV, I told my daughter, I am strong enough. She does not need to come to visit me, but rather, I would help her any time.   

There was very selfish and cruel colleague. He has no strong feeling to his parents, wife or sun. But, when he got the call informing him that his grandmother was severe sick, he took out all the money he saved, hurried to the hometown. His grandmother was 96 years of old. The doctor said there was no value for the treatment. This colleague asked the doctor, if there is any medication that can be used? The doctor said there was one drug that had not been used. The drug imported from Germany. But this drug might not work either. He asked if there would be any bad effect from this drug. The answer was no. The colleague said, then, if there is no side effect, use it now! He brought out the money to buy that imported drug for his grandmother… The grandmother who was in coma for several days opened eyes, smiled when she saw him: “My senior grandson come! Did you not have a sleep? Look, you appears very tired. Come and lie down beside me and have a sleep… Close your eyes.” She groped and found a covering to cover over him. This colleague said, it was his most happy time in his life when he lied down beside his grandmother holding her hands.

His mother, however, complained pain in front of him, asked for some money for pain killer, but he refused. It made me surprised that a lady nearly hundred was the objective of this colleague. I asked my daughter, if I am old, no any use, would my value reduce to zero? She tapped on my shoulder: “Not really. There is still your unlimited royalty to me.” Oh, I understand, this is my value as a dog. Daughter said: “Mother, when you becomes old and sit down the bed. You smile to me, upon seeing my come home from work. You see, would you be better than any pet?” What she said pointed to me a direction: being a pet.

 I think, if I really have no good-for-anything, to live seventy or eighty years of old, as a waste as cat or dog to eat leisure food, should I at least have a value of a pet? This makes me pay attention to the behavior of the pets, the warm of the dog, the soft of the cat, the cute and lovely of the bird… all are what I need to learn. In the consideration to be what kind of old people, I would not find any other better role than a pet. There is a old lady in the street selling pocket made by herself. The pocket is not so cute, but in which there is fragrant grass she planted. My daughter said, that is the really fragrant pouch. She kept such fragrant pouch beside her pillow whole of the year. There was a old man begging money. Heard his reason, I was convinced by his fast thinking and reasoning. I gave him some money and pointed to him a restaurant selling dumpling. I also told him which contain dumpling is delicious. I also have an elderly friend. She lived to 96 years of age. When she was 84 years of old, she run, by her self, to the building field where his sun was building a house. She unfortunately fell from a stare that has no fence yet at that time. She broke her three ribs. I thought she must be terribly damaged. I bought some gift and run to hospital to see her. Seeing her terrible condition, I felt very sad and hardly found any words to comfort her. She however told me: first, she was 84 years of old. Even if she died, it was not an early death. Second, one of the three broken ribs was healed now. With additional one healed, she would be able to work again. Indeed, no more than additional several days, the old lady tried to get up to cook for the family. I admire her fast thinking. On noon later, she told me she got sick. I cannot see what’s wrong with her. She showed me. She drunk a mouth of water, the water falling from the corner of her mouth. She could not close the mouth. She got stroke! I hurried out to call her sun’s wife. The wife came and wanted to bring the old lady to the hospital. She hold the door frame and resisted not to go. The wife told me that her sun went out for business traveling. What about that something happened to the old lady. So the wife called the one lady’s daughter.  The daughter came and brought the old lady to her home. Upon crumbling in the car, the daughter handed a herb pill called Zaizao pill[1] to the old lady. One week later, the old lady walked back by her self. Her disease was recovered. She told me she did not go to the hospital. She only ate that pills.

I observed these long-living people. They had not special way for health maintenance. My mother’s uncle lived nearly hundred years of old. His life style was blamed by my grandmother. My grandmother said he ate almost anything, what dead cat, dead dog, dead chicken, or diseased pig. He brought all of such things home to eat. A grandfather of my neighbor lived to 90 years of old about. He liked to fishing but could not get fish. Every time, what he got is a soft-shelled turtle. My grandmother joked with him for this quite often. When I was young, I bended my knee beside him, watching how he killed these turtles, but I had no patience to wait to see the turtle pushing out their heads. When he drunk the turtle soup, no one asked to share with him, but laughed at him. Now I regret no asking the soup to drink at that time.

Chapter 74 

Psoriasis, that is also called “Cow skin ringworm”, has bothered me for many years. I have tried many kinds of medications. They were either no effects, or only worked for a short time. I have also tried to see some experts. I went in their clinic room, sat there listening. I left soon since I do not agree with what they were talking. I felt it was really a joke. My mother was good at treatment of such disease, but I however got this kind of disease. The formula that my mother used was not recorded and left to me. I therefore have to live with this disease. Later, I heard by chance from one of my friend who was doctor in mental disease that psoriasis could be termed the second mental disease in human. This makes me pay attention to the physical-emotional characteristics of such disease.  

I know that people with blood type A are popular among patients with psoriasis. I am not type A, how could I get this kind of physical-emotional disease? Expert said it is a genetic inherit disease. There are almost no rules in the incidence. I thought, if it is due to genetic disorder, how could emotion affect the happening of the gene expression? In addition, my emotion is pretty stable, how could I make the gene angry?

Careful observation makes me find that, my disease indeed changed along with the change of my work and life style. When I worked as male role, and when I work, live and think as a social style, I get admire from people, I felt happy but the disease was worse at this time. When I lived as a natural style, following the nature, no one admires me or confirms my job, the disease was however relatively less severe. What does it mean? Does that mean that our social needs and the physiologic needs are not in consistence? After long time careful consideration I changed my work and life style, stop the career that is very promising other’s eyes. Pretty soon, my psoriasis disappeared. After that, there is no evidence for recurrence. I controlled the disease by adjusting the life manner.

To be honest, I am sad, even painful, for loss of my social values. My disease however gets cured in my pain. So I realized that happiness is not the only standard to mark the emotional health. One of my friends felt very sad to die for her devoice. All ask me to comfort her. I said don’t do so. I know that, sometimes, sadness is more following the emotional logic than happy. The surface harmony and happy marriage made her twists, suffered from many kinds of diseases. Her crying turned the long time twisted logic back to normal. It is not a bad thing. Why should we come to comfort her? I termed my ringworm as “small window of emotion”. If it happens, I would sit down, search the deep emotional roots. Among these roots, some are very deep. I cannot realize it without the happening of a disease.

In daily life, how a person realize that the work and life style that bring to you the honesty, dignity, the money and the social status, might in fact not suit you? Someone consulted with me where my disease was cured. I said it was cured by my self. I can control it to cure or to happen again. They felt it impossible, thought that I was joking. From this I think that the average life span of a male is shorter than female. Would that be due to the socialized life style that hurt the body? Does the man really social animal? A female can escape from the society, where the male goes? Is the happy in success the same as the happy for life? What kind of society human really need?

Women come into the society in a large quantity. They accept the reasoning of the society. Perceptional knowledge is not longer the half of the whole reasoning entity. One of my friends said, the human knowledge is as a tree. The perception part of women is as the root part under the soil. The rationing part of man is as the part of the tree above the land. The rationing of man should be the result they “read” the women’s perception. When the women are no longer perceptual, the human knowledge tree is pulled from the root. The men’s rationing knowledge becomes the wood without roots. The human knowledge becomes vine, not tree. Vine may crumb very high and very long, but it would regards the stuff on which it crumbs as reality not its self as reality.

Now, I can still find the reason for my disease through searching the deep emotional reasons for it. What about in future? Would science help us to search the deep reasons in emotional world? Many chronic diseases, as the stubborn ringworm (psoriasis), are emotional diseases. For them, the science is trying hard to solve. Many people criticize that Chinese medicine is to “guess disease”.  Evaluation on the course in which I tried to find the reason for the disease also shows kind of individual, occasional, and guessing characteristic. It is hard to find any evidence using science.  

When I was young, I also refused things that were guessed, due to the influence from my father. So, I refused to guess riddle, to play poke, or to buy lottery. I felt that a riddle as “Net house, red coat, white fatty inside” is an extremely boring game. Why we should describe the peanut with such twisted manner? Why Chinese are so glad to guess the riddles? I never got any award by guessing “lamp riddle” or “word riddle”. I felt it is not necessary to spend mind on such things.

Later however, I gradually noticed, there are such “riddles” all over the Chinese history, philosophy, medicine and literature. The novel << Red Chamber Dream >> is the biggest riddle. It attracted a lot of people to guess again and again from history. The “Dao”, “Yin-Yang”, “Five-elements” and many others that we think not worthwhile to spend mind, all show us the “net house, red coat…”, attracting us to search the corresponding historical real “peanut”.

The riddle-making person who is most close to us is the author Lu Xun[1]. But our ability to guess him is sharply declining. Some one said, the reason for him to made riddle is due to the fact that it was time the Guoming Party was dominated in China, which created “White terror” in China, not allowing any criticism. Why our ancient generations however make riddle in Chinese culture? I think, it might because our ancient Chinese also felt a kind of destroying power in the Culture.

“Peanut”, can this word allow implying what it is? When Chinese create word or phase, they chased for implying it meaning. This implication does not only mean “similar” to the shape of the stuff, but also allowing you image out its meaning. In addition, from one word, you should also be able to have connected, linked, related, or clustered shapes and meanings of other things. For example, the word “south”. In Chinese, the south could mean “noon” in time; mean “fire” in temperature; mean “heart” in the body organs; mean “summer” in season… you can continue to guess out again and again, no end. So, the word “south” is no longer a single word. “Net house, red coat…” could get rid of the “shape” of the “peanut”, but its “meaning”. When the word “peanut” can not imply us its original meaning, we can find the peanut in our space, through guessing “Net house, red coat…” We can re-find, re-establish our culture by this way.

Chapter 75

I saw a lot of herbs in a veteran hospital. I felt strange. The vet there told me, he was the medical consultant for several farms. The farms gave him a technique share, to inspire him the most active in work. By this way, his job changed from earn money by treating disease to earn share income. His emphasize on the work was also changed from the treatment to prevention. So, beside the vaccine, the herbs became his first choice for prevention, since he needs to care the financial cost. I asked, though the human and animals are all animals, there is much difference between the chicken and the human. How could you use the herbs? The vet said, why not? The mechanism is the same as human. In the autumn, the weather becomes cold, the lung of the chicken would also feel discomfort. Add some herbs in the feeding to the chicken, it would not catch severe disease. In spring, add some bitter vegetables in the feeding, it would also prevent the spring infectious disease. If we wait until the chicken really catch disease, even if it not dies, it would affect the production of eggs. So we loss in financial, right? For western medicine, beside the vaccine, whatever it has for prevention? In addition, the western drugs are too expensive.  

Heard this, I could not prevent from laughing. I think, it is of course not proper to regard the human society as the chicken farm, but if the officers who plan and dominate the healthcare reform can refer to the chicken farm model, the exist value of the Chinese medicine would certainly show out. So, to me, the conflict between the western medicine and the Chinese medicine is not so much as scholar aspect, as the backward of the financial situation.

That my mother tried to treat the small disease and to prevent disease in and out of the compound (community), is due to the fact that, once the mild disease becomes into severe disease, not because the Chinese medicine cannot treat severe disease, but under the financial difficulty, people give up treatment. Only 12 dollars, that girl who was the same age as me, and who suffered from aplastic anemia, died because her mother did not buy the herbs for her. It only costs  her mother 12 dollars! My mother fell tear when the girl died. Mother said, the herb was expensive for the ingredient “antelope horn”. But it could not be omitted. Mother blamed her self deeply for unable to use even cheaper way to save the life of the girl.

From beginning, the Chinese has no condition to develop with high costs and high risks. If Dr. Hua Tuo[1] did not want to treat the severe disease, he would have not died. For the combination of the western medicine and the Chinese medicine, to me, we should not chase for the combination in technique, but in the dislocation of the healthcare facility in society first. Of course, this depends on the government direction of the officers and the economic experts. On the road of the human development, ancient people said “Those who follows the nature would survive; those who acts against the nature would die”. We however said “Change the nature”. In fact, we did no die, and nature was neither changed. But it is clear that the cost is too high to act against the nature. Why we cannot have a good relationship with the nature? The sky (every thing in the sky), the earth (everything on the earth), and the human, there relationship set up the rule for the human philosophy and emotion. It is the Chinese medicine, that recognizes this relationship and transfers it into medicine. Of course, I think that the Chinese medicine can also transfer it into political-economic study.  

Chinese medicine is created by Chinese collectively. When mother was feeling pulse for a patient, all the people in the room were watching and listening. The patients were general examiner, who hold the active power. The doctor was the consulter. If the doctor can not be accepted by patients, he would not be able to practice medicine. When my mother was young, her medical skill of course was not good. During the course as a consulter for patients, the nice co-relationship with patients made her improve her clinic skill further. Therefore, Chinese medicine is a people’s medicine. It is a kind of human medicine. Nowadays, we deny this collective wisdom too carelessly.

The exist of human being is not only the consciousness, the only “layer”, there are much more under this layer too, e.g. many precipitations. The consciousness is the face of human, the precipitations are the body of human. The face is more modern, but the body needs to be close to the sky and the earth. In current time of human being, the face and the body of human is separated away. It is due to the “killing action” of modern science activity that chasing for the face but not the body. The result is the calling each other of the face and body – anxiety.

Compared with the western medicine, the “technique” in the Chinese medicine is relatively “void” or “empty” or “not solid, not concrete”. However, the learning contents in Chinese medicine beyond the “technique” are much more than in the western medicine. To master the relationship between the universe, the earth factors, and the human being is the pre-condition to learn and master the Chinese medicine.

The void of the Chinese medicine, is just the container role of the Chinese medicine. We use the container to hold and keep private things. The regulation in the hospital refuses private things. Since my mother had too much private things, she is not assistance with the hospital. Compared with the western medicine, the Chinese medicine appears very simple, without many technique contents. This is as the comparison between the Chinese coat the western unit. My hobby is to make clothes. I told my friends, I can do any kinds of dressing but not the western unit. My friends laugh: that means you have no enough skill, otherwise why you cannot making western style unit? I said, almost every course in making the western unit needs the help and facility by science technique. The style of the western unit is not made by hands, but high temperature heated and high power pressed in a machine that costs tens thousands or even hundred of thousands dollars. How can I do it with my hands?

When I was young, there was a gentle and refined patient. If he moved little bit, the edge of his clothes as fly up, layer by layer. If he kept not to move, the edge of his clothes also moved little bit as a small wave. The whole man as walked out from a poem, very scholarly and refined. I went around him several rounds to search why he appeared so gentle. After a serious rationing study, I believed that his charm came from his Chinese style of balanced leisure coat. Grow up in compounds, as known reasoning, I never compete with others for eat or wear. This time, I asked very formally from my mother, I want a similar clothes. My mother was very serious too. Very quickly, a blue coat of smooth-wave clothes was on my body.

Though I had it on my body, I did not show any poem. My classmates said that I looked as grey rat. I neither knew why I looked not nice or refined with this coat on body, that appeared made very carefully and refined. After many years, I understand, my coat was made using western style of technique. It was platen, suit to the body, without fold. On the body, there is no flying style as Chinese coat, neither the tall or straight of western coat. The coat of that patient was made by his mother by hands, using platen cutting, linked sleeve, with the collar towards more behind. In adding the collar, it should not fix on with equal distance, but fix several spots first farer, so, the dressing sticking up in front, but also raising on the behind. The dressing was not under balance, but also finding balance by it self. It moved even if the body did not move, showing a result of skirt fashion. Therefore, when we see the year 2001, the APEC conference in China, we see the “Chinese Coat” wear by the leaders of each country, showed as same stiff and inflexible as my coat that year. I was eager to tell these leaders, it was not the way to wear the “Chinese Coat” as they did. A sleeve of western style would make loss of the taste of the Chinese dressing. But including the designer of the dressing, would any people feel any defect for these “Chinese Coat” the leaders wear?

Chapter 76

I have a friend. When he heard that he got liver cancer, he asked his wife to call me. I brought a bound of flowers to visit him. He asked me two questions. First, was there any necessary for him to struggle against the disease? See that he lost his body weight as a speed of three kg everyday, his cutting-down slim body, and the bloodstain in front of his chest after his vomiting blood, I steeled my heart and told him, no need to struggle. He heard my answer, asked his family member to release the turtle to the river. He said, since it cannot save me, there is no need to kill it. The second question is, “Why good man lives no long?” I felt hard to answer, so I asked him back: “Is this world really so nice?” He died at that night.

This friend of mine is a very spiritual man. One day when we mentioned dance, I said everyman who danced with me turned dance into lesion to me. But I finally did not learn how to dance. Heard this, he smiled. He invited me to dance. That time, I was the queen in the dance, as I wear the “red shoes”. Dance became my genius show. After that, I however still do not know how to dance. When later on gentleman gave me lesions for dance, my attitude is no longer honest, but believe that it is them, who does not know dance.

The question he raised before death is not meaningless. I cannot say that there is no relationship between the good or bad of the person and his life span. I did not really answer his question, letting him died with sad. In fact, I admit the fact that good man does not necessarily live longer. I know it is a social question. There is a criminal. When asked why he commit the crime, he said, when he know he got cancer, there was no more days to live, he wanted to commit crime to be “happy” once. After referring to his hospital case, indeed he got cancer. According to the diagnosis of doctor, he would not be able to live longer to the adjustment day. For this, the forensic medical expert brought him to the hospital to check again. The result showed no cancer cells. The criminal was very angry, questing the doctor to explain, the doctor has to say that it was a misdiagnosis. The criminal did not get happy since he had no cancer. He blamed the doctor for he had to stay in jail. I think, the chance of misdiagnosis by the hospital is not high. Most possibly, it is the “happiness” of the criminal that dissolved the tumor. Being a good man, he got cancer; being criminal, the cancer cured his disease. Would this be the more evidence that good man does not live long? Being a good man, suffered from suppress, which hurt his health. This means that the principle of “Stronger one eat weaker one” works. The question my friend raised before his death reflected his confusion as a human. When we admire the stronger, struggling, how could person as my friend not feel suppress? He could make a woman who does not know dance danced as a dance queen. It means he endeavored to allow others to express their ability rather than his. How nice and valuable personal quality of him?  He however paid for his life.

Among the people with same age, I participated much more kind of job than others. Whenever there was a competition for job position in our company, asking the latest one leave, I cannot endure the eyesight of my colleagues. I would tell them: “I oppose the competition, argue that the person who has higher ability to leave. I can find new job, so I leave. “ I would feel any happiness in the victory of the competition.

Several days ago, I read an article. It opposed against birth control policy. The article said, there are many Chinese, but the extra ones are children? But what we reduced the population is the children. After read this article, we felt embarrassed, felt as we, those of old people, taken out the space for children. Now it seems that the action of my mother’s master is pretty conscious. Nothing hard to understand him now (He refused to live longer). It might be that good man should not live longer.

However, that doing bad thing might make people happy is not assistance with the life logic, since it is not the way the society established. I do not regard the moral with different eye or principle. I told my daughter, moral is not something good. Nothing real, true, or hypocritical with it. A group of robber want to live more than three days, they need the same moral as us. Being a person who does not follow moral could feel happiness and live longer, will have cost of others health and live. The damaged is not only good people, but also the society. We should also consider this big medicine cost.

The award mechanism of the human society is far and far away from the human nature. When the human nature asked to return, people usually went to the road of crime. For example, to steal or embezzle makes people feel more happiness as primitive picks up fruit, than work hard to earn money. There was a embezzling officer, he was not short of money at home but he continued to embezzle. After into the jail, I thought he would collapse in spirit. One time, I organized a law education in the jail, there was a proposal to ask him to have a talk about his emotion to embezzle. I said he would not do such thing that lose his face, but however, accepted without hesitate.

In the jail, I saw him as same active as before. He calculated to me that he earned more mark, reduced more penalty than others. The award mechanism in the jail made him find the direct happiness as embezzle. However in the society, it is very hard for us to get the primitive happiness as “picking fruit” and “hunting” from our work. We normally suffer from the social pressure that suppress the human nature. How our body would not catch problem in such life? On the other side, if we let the good man to behavior as a bad man against the social moral, it would also make him pay the cost of body health. You see, if we do not make the human life regulation in assistance with the personal body-heart logic, it would be very difficult to let a good man lives long.

My daughter told me, Buddhist monks also get sick. She felt the pulse for some monks. The pulses were weak. She said, it indicated that being a monk was against the nature. Human being need normal diet, eating some meat. I said, when Chairman Mao asked eating of Hongshao pork? It was usually after victory or after finish a article writing. The current monks are hard to escape from the society. Many monks use computer, visit internet, even buy stocks. Any such action would exhaust their heart energy and spirit energy. If they insist on vegetarian food, how would their body not become weak? Therefore, it is not that the life style of the monks is against the nature, but that the modern life of the monks is away from the original road. If we stand on the current time point to assess the life of monks correct or not, the monks need to eat meat and should get marriage too. In this way, monk is no longer a monk.

We really need to stand on other time-space point to assess the current time-space and make some necessary adjustment to it. In another words, we should not look at things in history and in the world always with the current point of view. We need to look at the current things from the historical point of view too. As in this point, we not only need to understand the “today’s history”, but also “today in history”. This is the value of history in today.

Chapter 77

If there were no liquor, I am sure, the number of people who get sick and who had to stay in jail would have reduced to half. There is no nutritional value for the liquor or cigarette, but the social costs of drinking liquor and smoking is huge.

It is reported that, the death number of people died of smoking or of smoking-related disease will exceed sum of those die from AIDS, tuberculosis, hard birth delivery, car accident, suicide, and murder. In China, the number of population who smoke exceeds 3 billion. In the whole world, among every ten cigarette smoked, there are three of them smoked in China. 67 man over 100 Chinese male smoke. Smoking costs about 42.9 billion dollars for the health loss in China.

More than 5 billion Chinese drink liquor. The car accident due to alcohol-drinking is 80% of all reasons for car accidents. Liquor-dependent has been listed as a big category. Patients belong to this group is about 10% of all hospitalized patients. Alcoholics has become the “number one public harm”. My father does not drink or smoke. He said, the person controlled by addiction is easy to loss self dignity. For those who take narcotics, he believes that they are not human. 

Watching foreigner film, one police leader, a hero, was injected drug by the Mafia. He then became a pitiful creature crawling on the ground begging. So, the hero motion cannot beat a syringe of narcotic, half bottle of alcohol. From this point, human is material creature. It is not wrong to say that material is the first.

What’s the most painful in jail? It is smoke addiction. When I brought criminal in court, I usually prepared some cigarette. One day, I brought one criminal in court, who has another partner in the same case. The first one smoked off his share of cigarette, asked me for the cigarette for his partner. He said, the partner did not smoke. I gave him. When I brought the second one, he asked cigarette with strong hope. When he got known that his share had been occupied by his first partner, he fell tear. He cried very sad for unjust treatment and made decision to expose other crime by that partner. He said: “he is so steel in heart to occupy my cigarette!” Only one cigarette broken the “friendship” between them.

A murderer hates alcohol. He said to me: “It is the alcohol that destroyed me. I am not going to drink the cup of liquor before killing me.” When opening the court, he was brought from small cabinet of the jail. I asked what wrong he committed for the jail regulation. He said he drunk liquor. Someone brought into the jail a plastic bag of liquor. The “criminal leader” gave him award to allow him to drink little. He refused. The “leader” insulted him: “I see you a death-criminal, no many days for you to live, so I allowed you to drink it. You however do not understand my good heart. what’s use for your regret now? There is no chance for you to change to good man now…” He felt the tongue-lashing was reasonable, so he drunk some. The smell of the alcohol was found by the discipline, who requested him to stay in the small cabinet for penalty. He asked me: “You see, am I not hurt to die by alcohol?” It is the alcohol that hurt people, but it is the people who is punished. The alcohol has no any penalty at all.

When I was young, I wanted to be an officer as Lin Zexu[1] to forbid opium or alcohol. But when Gorbachev forbidden alcohol in Russia, I laughed. Gorbachev is a straight mind person. His way of thinking is admired by the western. How can such a simple thing, as a general secretary of a big country, he failed to fulfill it? When I was young, I chased for a steel mind, I wanted my self a man made of special material, though I was not a communist party member. My father does not drink or smoke, but he takes snack. I however, do not take snack. My grandmother said, those who likes snake is easy to be wheedled. My mother said however: “Like snake means health”. I tried my self to resist my mother’s “wheedle”, lived as a puritan. The direct result of such living style is that my feeling is more and more sensitive. I clearly feel that from my bone, I am an addictive people. I have a feeling to like the smoke and alcohol, though I did not make it as my goal. I drunk coffee, tea, and become addictive to them. This makes me have poor sleep. During giving up them, I realized that they are also a toxic.

Dr. Li Shizheng write in his book << Ben Cao Gang Mu[2] >>: people addictive to the tea, chewing the tea in mouth from time to time. After long time, it damages Yinqi and Blood. Their faces are pale, yellow and withered. They got sick but they continued without regression. It is well known the harm of coffee. It is said that the early death of Mr. Balzac was due to the coffee. I have also tried to given up pepper. My daughter said that people with weak heard should not eat pepper as me to chew pepper in mouth piece by piece. After I got recurrence of the heart disease, I had to stop the pepper.

During the painful course for various giving up, I understand the meaning of spirit empty. It is not something wrong in the world view, not needing the thinking to fill, but need material to fill it up. So, I chew betel palm. I chew something as “Shazha pill”, “Guipi pill”, “Yimu pill[3]”. I comfort my self as this is more dignity than picking cigarette end. My daughter said, why this way? You had better drink some herbal tea. I went to a doctor, asking for herbs. Actually what I wanted is the grass root and tree barks!

Now, I realized, were the goals of all addictive gentlemen not the “grass root and plant barks”? If allowing me to live in nature, I may find some grass to eat by my self. I may be second “Shennon[4]”. It is said by all that it is not hard to give up the drugs in philosophy but hard in emotion. I cannot prevent from asking: why there is addition in emotion? Would this addition is not a calling from far away sky? Cigarette, coffee, tea, pepper, opium poppy, hemp, all are the “grass” in the land. “Grass” addition has been sediment in the human gene. If this addition is gene-related, is part of our body, how giving-up action against these smoke and alcohol would succeed?

Scientist explain the mechanism of addition from the chemistry. I admit that this world is chemical one. The human is chemical, the hundreds of “grass” are also chemical. Even the whole of human life can also be regarded as a chemical reaction course. The “addition” asks the reaction of the human in and out of the body.

“The addition” needs to be met from time to time, but given up from time to time too. The consideration of restriction in Chinese medicine is to ask a balance in chemical reaction. Purification technique and artificial drugs make the filling up as the dominating power in the chemical reaction, makes impossible to give up the addition. When using the western medicine to solve the addition, it comes quite often that the addition disappears but the people disappears too (died). Or, the medicine used for giving up drugs became a new additive reason. 

Currently, for quitting drug, the Chinese medicine works, as it works in the treatment of cancer, not directly kill the cancer cells, or to quit the drug. What it does, is to save the human life, is to support the defense ability of the body, is to re-balance the disordered Qi and Blood in every part of the body. The medication used in the Chinese medicine is the “Grass roots and plant barks”, is the course of the “addiction”. It is to open the window in the body, through which the body chemical exchanges and reacts with the chemical in the nature, to make the human and nature in harmony in the chemical reaction. From this point of view, it is really worthwhile to study the Chinese herbs – such multiple natural “original elements”.

Chapter 78

The human life is so fragile. It can disappear in a flash; it is also very strong, which is hard to explain by modern science. I know one person, who lied on the bed from his 18 years of old to now he is 40 years of old. He suffered whole buy paralysis from rheumatism. As Mr. Stephen William Hawking, he had also only three fingers that can move. Mr. Hawking can sit on the wheelchair, but he cannot even sit up. Mr. Hawking was sentenced by doctor, when he was 22 years of old, being able to live for two years, but he has lived to his 65 years birthday. Mr. Hawking enrolled to traveling in space in year 2009, to finish his childhood dream. The doctors said, if he comes to the space, he must die in the spacecraft. I agree with the doctors. If he could live back, it would turn off the physiology.

My that friend who fallen from stairs died after lying on the bed less than one year. Doctor explained, if one lied down on the bed for more than one week, the muscle will reduce for 20%. Human function is the more use the better. If the muscle is not under use, it would shrink in mass. Lying on bed makes it possible that the activity of breath, the stomach and intestine movement; the blood circulation becomes stagnated; immune system ability is reduced; the degeneration of various organs and tissues starts; the secondary damage of the organs is hardly avoided. All in all, it means that every road leads to death. This friend died of lung infection. Since paralysis is hard to live from the physiology point of view, how my this friend with paralysis can live for 40 years? There are evidences that he may live longer than some apparently health people. Why people as Mr. Hawking, who was sentenced by western medicine to death, can last his life for so long as it is hard to believe? Is it really as the western medicine said, their body defense system is so fragile? If it is so, how could them live so long? If their defense system function are not low, what’s the reason and how to explain previously the western medicine said? The physiology theory cannot explain why a person can live long time without being able to move.

That the relationship between the health and long life span, that between the life and movement, is hardly completely explained by current science. This inspires me to image the human life that is in the evolution end. What is the shape of life? What shape it can be? To Hawking, we may explain that he got the best health service in the world – several nurses worked for him day and night. But the person I know of, lost mother when he was young, lost father when he was in middle life. He had no scholar degree, not job, has very little life and healthcare conditions. He commonly has no people around him to care him. He had to endure thirsty and hungry, endure the bowel movement, and other inconvenience… I saw him always lied there by him self alone, using a cotton cloves putting under his body. His thigh looked as same big as a normal people, but if you look at it carefully, you would find that the muscle has already shrunk, the size is due to the puffy bone. Such quality of bone would broken with a slight bend. He had several ulcers in his body, with bone out. He had no medicine, so he used several paper to cover it. It however cured by it self.

His life inspired us, shaken others, and implied to us something. I joked with him, the God only created his head, not the body. Mr. Hawking who lived with only one brain almost turns the whole world. This of my friend, his spiritual power is also very strong. I remembered an ancient article I learned in my middle school textbook << Various Memory in Jail >>. It said that the environment in jail was very bad. It had always infectious disease. There were always some prisoners who died every day. But it is strange that, the prison who was sentenced heavy penalty almost had no disease. Even if they got sick, they would get better pretty soon. The author said, this is because the severe prisoner had overwhelming Qi. At that time, I thought, it appeased that the Overwhelming Qi in the body could increase the function of body immune system.

No matter it is Mr. Hawking or this one I know, both are not weak in their Qi though their body are weak. If we do not say that their Qi is as strong to pushing to the universe, it is as strong to the sky.  When the father of this one I know was alive, he hold his both hands to said to the sky: my God, it is lucky you let him lied down, otherwise, he may pouch broken the sky!

From the body of people as Mr. Hawking, we know that, the big ambition of a male might have some kind of material character. It is said, the home of Mr. Hawking is with a lot of pictures of Marylin Monroe; his second wife is one of his beauty nurses. This one I know also made several girl falling in love with him. The wife he chosen makes many healthy men envy.

Book, is the representative of spiritual power. We observed that, no men who lost “body” do not use the book to complete them selves. Mr. Hawking is so; the Ostrowski, the author of book << How the steel was tempered >> was so; this one I know also wrote a book of 2000000 words. Mr. Ostrowski realized the relationship between the treatment and saving life after nine severe surgical operations. He told the doctor who was going to perform the tenth operation for him, he said: I have already donated some of my blood to the science. The remaining part, I prefer to leave for my self to do some thing else. Then he started to write book.

The goal of the western medicine is on the “disease”, while that of the Chinese medicine is on the “life”. If the patient still has his “life”, there is chance to continue to treat; if there is no “life”, who can help? To combat the “disease” without caring about the patient “life” is opposed by Chinese medicine. From this point of view, I opposed against the “treatment”. “Doctor can treat the disease but cannot save the life” means the disease can be treated but the life cannot be treated, but be protected, to be saved. For some diseases, it is hard to cure. It can cause paralysis to the patient, but not cause death to him. If it is tried to treat, it might cause the death to him very soon.  I think, if Mr. Ostrowski were not performed that nine times of surgical operations that damaged his Yuan Qi (body life powere), he might not die at 32 years of old. As science, it should not only be able to explain common phenomenon, but also some special cases.

The theory in the Chinese medicine about the life, the Qi and Blood, and the spirit might be able to explain my question about the living of Mr. Hawking.

The concept of spirit in Chinese medicine refers to the libido blood and “Shen”. Chinese medicine believes, there is no shape of human, there is impossible to grow a Shen. With the human body but no the Shen, the body is not alive. In the relationship between the material and the spirit, the Chinese medicine regards the material as the priority (the first pre-condition). Chinese medicine however also believes that, the Shen is the master of the body. It is the Shen that governs the body every thing. From this point of view, Chinese medicine emphasizes the important role of the Shen. The Shen is based on the libido blood, and libido blood is its attaching base. The lift and reduce of Yang Qi in the body is the life of the body. The life is the most basic character of human. The paralysis person has life and disease. His “Shen” still works as governor of the body material part. His libido blood is still used by the Shen. It is still supplying strong material support to Mr. Hawking’s mind. People in the whole world already feel the penetration power of Mr. Hawking.

The one I know is as Mr. Hawking. His most big movement is the storm in his brain. I admired his sensitive in thinking and his fast in reaction. From the life point of view, the lives of Mr. Hawking and other are not only strong, but also healthy, so the outside disease-causing factors can not work on their body. Mr. Hawking had three children with his paralysis body. His interesting to woman never lost. Is this the function of the libido blood? The one I know, is red in face, strong in voice, bright in eye slight. He got a child when he got married at his 38 years of old.

Chapter 79

Modern society supplies reality and possibility for multiple doctor models. Doctor has no the same model. Even if in ancient China, Chinese medical doctor had two models: earning doctor and teaching doctor. My uncle is not a teaching doctor, nor a earning doctor. I called him a “working doctor”. When my mother’s mother died, he was only three years of old. Using his word, it was my mother, who took the responsibility of mother to him. When my mother was young, she went everywhere, north or south. She always brought her this brother. Naturally, he was brought into the door of Chinese medicine. He was sent to Chinese medicine school to study. After graduate, he was allocated into a hospital as a doctor. He married with an acupuncturist there.

As a doctor, he was well. He worked carefully, responsibly. He was good in professional test, clinic research, even for his English level. He worked and eventually to a president position of that hospital. My mother and her brother, the brother and sister, one was good at clinic, and another was good in organization job. Would both are good doctor? My mother believed that her brother do not know how to treat patient. She said, for a patient whom a doctor can make a diagnosis of “Shi Zhen”[1] easily, he however prescribed supplementary herbs.

For this, I have asked my uncle. He said: “How could I not recognize the Shi and Xu Zhen? Your mother is too stupid, too foolish. She cannot understand the feeling of patients. The herb I prescribed is only a herb that supporting the male function.” I said, wouldn’t your way be harmful to the patient? He said, many people would not realize what is correct and what is wrong, until they would get a lesson. If the body of these patients will come into problem soon or later, do you think it would be better to let the problem come soon or later? It the problem comes earlier, there may have chance to help them, and if it comes late, it would be difficult. How could you say that I am hurting them? Though what he said is kind of heresy or fallacy, I could not find any word to oppose him.

In deed, the older a Chinese medicine doctor, the higher his reputation in clinic. My uncle so should be a very busy man. He however plays chess, goes to fishing, visits internet, lives a very easy life. He does not do any clinic work. Only his wife, who is an acupuncturist, is very busy to do acupuncture to patient. Before, there is no saying that a Chinese medicine doctor is to retired. No one gives him pension. They have to work until they cannot due to physical body condition. My mother continued her clinic work until her last day. However to my uncle, performing Chinese medicine is to perform a job. Job is his source of living. So, when he got pension and no need to work, he stop to perform any clinic work. Therefore, though he is old now, he cannot be regarded as a old Chinese medicine doctor. When my mother worked in hospital, beside her clinic work, she was also a teacher for newly graduated doctors. I saw her photo together with her students in that class.

This group of Chinese medicine doctors, who are the same ago as my uncle, and who start working after the establishment of the New China, first learned is to adapt the working and hospital environment. The “working” and the clinic is the same thing, some times. For example, when we emphasize “Saving the nearly death, help the wounded”, it is so. But some times, they are not the same thing. For example when we emphasize the interests of the hospital, they are different things. A hospital means it needs to unite the thinking of the doctors with job; to restrict the action of doctors with regulations; so to ensure everything in the hospital running properly. Therefore, some times, responsible to work may not mean responsible to patient. Even if a doctor paying much more warm in his job does not mean he is much more warm to patient.

From heart feeling, the public could not accept the death case of a pregnant woman in Beijing Chaoyang hospital[2]. From the job point of view however, the doctor there committed nothing wrong. They are not careful? Not responsible? Yes. Then, in hospital, could we ask the doctor more than it is needed in a clinic? It is the mild difference between the job and clinic that causes the doctor-patient conflict. I think, the generation of Chinese medical doctor as my uncle practiced Chinese medicine as a “job”. Would it be another reason that causes the degeneration of the Chinese medicine?

We are so used to a job that we never question the job. When I was young, I felt that job is a glorious word. I felt that it was the evidence of backward and foolish of my mother for her not participating job (working in hospital). Now we can see that, because the ancient Chinese government did not administer hospital, making the Chinese medicine no “job” to find, having to face the patient directly,  the Chinese medicine therefore kept active life in history.

If we say that my mother learns Chinese medicine is to help patients and save their life, my uncle learns Chinese medicine is to find a “job”, my daughter, this generation, learns Chinese medicine is to have a University degree. In this way, the Chinese medicine doctor is much far away from the medicine. Therefore it is not at all strange that many graduates from Chinese medical university change to other kind of job after their graduation. Often my relatives asked where my daughter would work after her graduation. Neither my daughter or I think that is a question. To find a job, or to go to university, for my daughter, is a tool not a goal. I don’t want my daughter understand the “job” deeper than the patient. Chinese medicine doctor can choose not to have a “job”. If they have prescription right, they can perform Chinese medicine at home, or in a herb shop. Doesn’t matter if it is a “job” or not, but they should perform the clinic.

My daughter said, even if she organize a hospital, it would be a loss structured unite. My daughter suggested my nephew to learn Chinese medicine. I opposed. I think that he is a “hand is before the mind” person. I don’t think he is suitable to learn Chinese medicine. My daughter however think that the Chinese medicine is a much broad area, there will anyway something my nephew can do. Later, my nephew, after learned Chinese medicine, showed his genius in surgical operation. He is good at sewing massed wound. Watch his diary in internet, it was written as a clinic history (medical record). It was so clear for every step, how sewed the intestine, how connected the tendons, that it can be an operation rule. I joked, for those who turned to the hands of my nephew, would have clear and complete body even if he was dead. Though it is said, no use to sew the dead so nicely, those who survived must be sew in a perfect way. From this point of view, it is reasonable that my nephew sew every kind of body regardless it is dead or alive.  

When the body is damaged into open wound, the Chinese theory is broken too. My daughter would felt loss when she faces a body with blood and opened wound. Her characteristic of strong analysis ability in brain is not practical as my nephew to sew it right away. So, when they work together, I feel more comfort than allow them work separately. But, it makes me worry since his good at the surgery suggests that he needs the adhesion to a hospital. I asked about the current situation in hospital. It is full of staff in every level of hospital. It would be very difficult that he join the job. He has to come into a hospital no matter how difficult it might be anyway. How can set up a complete surgical operation for him self alone? Now I understand why the surgery in Chinese medicine is not advanced. In history, there is no Chinese medicine hospital. It is really true that something is good in one aspect and it might be bad in another aspect.

It is the need of social reality that there is multiple kinds of doctors. So, the idea against either the western medicine or the Chinese medicine does not allow the development of the whole human medical system. For the sake of both my mother and my nephew, I hope to keep the western medicine and Chinese medicine at the same time and allow them develop together.

Chapter 80

For my idea about the combination of western medicine and Chinese medicine, I heard some opposed opinion from both western medicine and Chinese medicine. An internet friend wrote to me: your idea is as let the plane in sky bring the train to run on the land. I think that the regarding the western medicine as plane and the Chinese medicine as a train is better than my analogy for Chinese medicine as a “knife for cow or chicken”. We did not cancel the train after we have plane. From a prospective point of view, the plane will not replace the train either. This is not established on the function of the plane and train. We need also consider the earth energy source and the ability of earth to endure air pollution. In addition, someone fears taking plane. I cannot keep from laugh when I see the conductor in the plane showing the safety technique. If the plane falls down, what’s the use of the safety methods?

Combination of the western medicine and the Chinese medicine is not my idea from theory, but realistic need. During going to a doctor, the public has already had the combination of the western medicine and the Chinese medicine. When coming to the Chinese medicine, patients usually bring a lot of lab test report with them. The patients who come to the Chinese medicine are either full of western medicine drugs, or have had surgical operation, or have had chemotherapy or radiation therapy. All such conditions have to be faced by a Chinese medicine doctor. It is no longer impossible for a Chinese medicine doctor to work in a pure natural environment without consideration of the effects of western medicine to the body.

If it is true that my mother’s master could work without consideration of the western medicine to the body, it is impossible up to my mother, her generation of Chinese medicine doctors, to work this way. For a patient who has had been treated by western medicine, my mother must recognize what happened to him by the western medicine. Even if it is only common cold, the use of western medicine makes it from surface into a inside condition. If the doctor does not consider this, he cannot treat the common cold either.

For the Chinese medicine doctor as my daughter’s master, they have to use the western medicine terms and explain the meaning of the reports such as lab tests, ultra sound, CT, MRI etc. I think, through the changes in the fingers in these reports, Chinese medicine doctors have more consideration points for the use of herbs and therapy. It might not be a bad thing for the Chinese medicine. I have had several times of emergency conditions before, I wanted to find a Chinese medicine doctor, but where I can find one? For this, I have been given steroid, including imported one. The doses used were so high that the doctor dared not to use. It is the expert in Beijing urged to use in double. But the side effects of the western medicine made me feel as got more kinds of diseases, terrible.

With the help of my brother’s wife, I take a herb formula that I got from a old Chinese medicine doctor who was ninety years of old and lived in another city. With it, my disease is under control. Considering the fact that, the old doctor has been pretty old, he kept his formula as a secrete, I would have nowhere to ask for help if he died, and there needs three days to send me the herbs through a fast UPS system, I kept little bit herbs each time he prescribed to me. When I take the herb s, I do not use water but hold the herbs in the mouth to chew, so to identify the ingredients of the herbal formula. I indeed get known of the main ingredient. I bought the herb that I guessed, and take it. The healing effect is also good. I felt pretty happy. Last time I got emergency again. I tried the same herb I guessed, but it did not work. I have to use steroid drugs again. The side effect made me suffered a lot. Later the old doctor knew this, and blamed me why not to see him. My brother’s wife so told him that I kept some herb each time. The old doctor laughed. He laughed at me for enjoying clever myself. He said that, the reason each time for my recurrence is different. This time, my disease recurred with heart disease. The herb cannot got help from heart, so it did not work. He then prepared new formula and saved me again. This time, I did not want to guess out what herb ingredient he used, nor want to know his formula, since I know it is no use to know it. He treated me with the Chinese medicine reasoning, not the formula. How can I master this? If the old doctor dies, I will have to use the western medicine until I die too.

The development of human reorganization, all in all, is the course to add eyes, brains to human, e.g. a course to add more sense organs. I said before, what is philosophy? It is that a blind talks about color. Tens of articles written by blinds is not worthwhile to let the blind to open a eye. The instrument of the western medicine makes our eyes sharper. But this is not enough. One of my friends said, why the creatures from the “three star hill” had a pole eye? It is because the people at that time had recognized that human eye is horizontal eye, which can only see the space but not the time. So the creature in the “Three star hill” used the pole eye to tell us that we should use the historical eye to see the things. This is the vertical eyes. That the Chinese who chasing for view with the vertical eyes is valuable reference even for the current science.

Chinese medicine is a time-space medicine, especially the time medicine. The state of medicine is to turn a naked eye into wisdom eye. Einstein said, the most mysterious thing in the world is that it is recognizable. I think, as the main body of the recognition, human being is the most super detecting instruments of the world. When we create machine and electric instrument, don’t forget the human that is the created and modified by nature for billions of years already.

As a Chinese, I suggest to live a whole and complete course of life. I told me daughter, the life wisdom is as the lotus in a pool. It doubles it size every day and it fill up the whole pool for 20 days. In deed, when at the 27 days, the human wisdom is only half pool. Human may get the full wisdom at the last time of the life. So, I believe that ancient people have wisdom. Time is not the platen stage allowing people to show. As a good wine or perfume needs to store for a long time to allow each component to adjust each other again and again, our human life runs along with time, making “today” have chemical reaction with the “yesterday”, “the day before yesterday” one by one. Every time, such chemical reaction makes the “yesterday”, “the day before yesterday” change their color and nature.

From this point of view, I oppose against stop the course of life as our like. At the same time, I recommend to those who want to stop life, their comment to the life is not the truly definition. If one really has the scientific exploration spirit, one should wait for the understanding that the time gives. For the same reason, I oppose to separate history into different periods, since the history is a continuous course. The significance of history will change upon the end of “today”. You can even find that, there is calling from history to today. There has been some “hint”.

The “rising” of western medicine started fro previous “hiding”, so the “hiding” of Chinese medicine suggests its “rising” later. This is really that the time turns (circumstances alter cases). Therefore, the real Chinese medicine people do not hurry or urgent. They know what they need to do.

One of my colleagues changed her job. Before she left, she send me a basin of vine plant. It crew  up to my green tree very quickly. It made the tree lose its color near to withered. Just when I believed that the tree failed in this competition, I found it started to turn its loss to win. Finally, the green tree won. It made the vine withered with only a small branch.

The basin-protecting grass in the flower basin had very tiny seeds, as small as needle tip. It uses “explosion” to spread its seed. I watched the ceiling with crowd of its seeds and felt strange: how strong effort and power it needs to make so small seeds rising up to the ceiling? If it is as a size as an apple, would it be a atomic bomb? I grow a bamboo in a pot. Every time I only change half of water in it. After half year, I found a lot of water snail! It should be known that our water comes from underground not from river. It has already made me confused a small biologic environment in a small office room.

Chapter 81

Having children at home, it is considered to have vaccine injection to them. My nephew and niece are living with us. Plus my daughter, they need the vaccine injection this one or that one, again and again, quite often. After injection, the children have some kind of reaction more or less. Later one day, I said, you actually do not need to have the vaccine injection. Think this way: if all of your classmates are injected, no one will get disease. Who will transfer to you? So, if indeed they all have had injection, you don’t need to have vaccine. One time, it had been asked to have vaccine for epidemic meningitis for all children and students, from those in kindergarten to high school. After injection, the children got erupted side effects. The hospital was full of these children. The whole city became scared, me too. I asked my three children. They all had their own idea: none of them have had the vaccine! I said: “Now, well, the children in the whole city might transfer it to you three. What should we do?” The train was stop at that time, so had my nephew and my niece sent by car. My daughter said she did not want to leave. She said: “I want to live or die with the people in the hometown!” I locked my daughter at home. I participated a “working team”. We went to the school helping the diagnosis. After two busy weeks, all are past ok.

My daughter’s cousin got type B hepatitis after injection of the type B hepatitis vaccine. The use of steroid drug caused overweight, and many other diseases in the body. I have a friend. She did not get marriage. All suspected she might have some disorder in philosophy and psychology. I raised this question to her. She was pretty frank. She said that, before her 20 years of old, she was as the same as other girls interesting to the male. One day when she went in the countryside to chop fire-sticks. She got confused in the road and got frozen. She was later sent to the hospital. Doctors used large dose of steroid. Later, when she sees male’s courteous and greeting as see a show by a clown. She said, with such emotion and psychology, it would hurt others as well as herself. So, there is no choice by keeping single.

My friend gave birth. After the baby was birthed out, doctor said the baby had little asthma. Doctor put the baby on the scale, the body weight is enough. A mixed vaccine was then injected to the baby. It was baby of others, not mine, so it is not good for me to stop the vaccine. I would have liked to say if the vaccine was delayed for a while, since the baby had little asthma. Upon coming into the body, the body would have some reaction. Would this increase the burden to the  baby body? After injection, the baby was put in warm cabinet, infused with some intravenous infusion liquid with antibiotic, and infused with oxygen too. All of these actions made me very nervous. So little body, just came into the world, was forced to take so many things. How could he endure?  I put my hands in the warm cabinet. The new born baby held my finger without losing it the whole night.

I asked the doctor, I heard that, after a long time of oxygen infusion, there might be permanent damage to the version of the baby. Should we consider it? The doctor said it is hard to think things so far, it is needed to consider the current need. That night, I had a pushing feeling to hold the baby into my chest. In the morning, before I left, I asked the family member of my friend to give the baby a finger to hold. They laughed at me. I left. The baby died soon. The baby had only asthma. If the result was still a death, after using so many therapy means, why we must use them? Why we would not stop walking until our body against the wall?

When my mother was alive, she opposed to give intravenous infusion to so small baby. My mother, who usually asked her patients do not eat cold food or drink cold beverage, said the infusion was as to pour cold water to the baby. The baby would die if his Yang Qi would be able to floating up. When many babies, who was treated in the hospital and the condition became worse and worse, came to my mother, my mother would only stop the infusion, that resulted in the babies’ condition better and better day by day. If a doctor, who only acts according to science but not Yin-Yang, will certainly pour cold water to the babies. Mother also opposed to use the intravenous infusion to those of old people, who showed low level of Yang Qi in the body. She believed that, it would damage the little remaining Yang Qi in the body furthermore.  

Since we understand a treatment as continuously use of therapies, without action is therefore regarded no treatment. Many medical conflicts suit again the doctor for not performing therapeutic actions. Now patients may suit the doctor’s saving action is a performing show.  So, I think that, the western medicine does not think that so many therapeutic actions to the small baby and old people is really necessary. That they are performing is to avoid the blame against them for do nothing.

Science is certainly a short cut. But would it be a good thing for human always to go the short cut? There has been a young boy who came to me. He asked me that you are lawyer, tell me in truth, how big cost for crime? For example, if I smuggle, how much the risk rate it would be? I told him, the risk rate for one time smuggling is 1%. He felt happy after heard my answer: then it is worthwhile to smuggle. I said, however, once a person choose to be traitor, would he have braveness to be a dignity and glorious hero again? The risk to be a traitor is the hurt of people’s thinking style, and the damage of the person’s spirit. The risk rate to choose a wrong road is 100%. Whenever there was a death case (murder case) that was not detected out yet, I would comfort the family of the affected family, the case must be detected later. My experience is that, the criminal who murdered others would float out again, as he was pushed by a ghost. My daughter said that I am cheating people with superstition. I said, no, I am not. If a person went to a life road against the human nature, his emotion would change no matter he wants or not. It would be very hard for him to turn to normal road again, so he would do something again beyond his own control. From this point of view, that the Buddhist’s saying "put away the knife, and the butcher becomes a Buddha immediately", means it is very difficult to turn from a wrong road.

Science technique allows human being “smuggle” rich from the nature. It also damages the braveness of human that accumulated through billions of years in the natural living environment. It would be very difficult for human to get this braveness again. But what a road we are walking now? We have not considered this question carefully yet.  

Now, it is impossible for human to find back our braveness to face nature and live in a natural condition. It is normal reaction for current human being to twist calf muscle when meet a wolf. I said to my daughter, in nature, if the rabbit meets wolf, it does not scare to loss urine but face the wolf to struggle against the wolf calmly. The result for the rabbit against the wolf does not always ends as the victory of the wolf. It is not the rule for animal when they face the strong opposite. Now, people is continuously pushed a “wisdom” reasoning to give up to a stronger opposite.

The reason that the Chinese medicine does not chose to give up for the reason that Chinese medicine theory and thinking style respect human individual nature and individual value. It believes that, due to the exclusiveness of the time and space, every person has an exclusiveness that others can not replace. In another word, the exist of a person does not deny the exist of another one. Saying that the current human is clever than ancient human, and that current scientific achievement can replace the whole achievement of human being in previous times, in fact is expanding the current time and space without limitation. The time and space, in which the current human stay, is of course exclusive, no one can replace it. It has its own exclusive nature, but the gene of human being does not mutate suddenly. Where is the evidence showing that the current human is clever than old generations? From gene point of view, the current human is simply the recurrence of ancient human being. What we have more is the historical experience. But our human being goes for these hundreds of years the “blink bear picks up corn”. The corn in our hands is only one. How can we believe that we are clever than ancient human and rich than them?

I can think that I occupied more knowledge than my grandmother, but I cannot think that I am cleverer than her. I know that, many questions that confusing many experts can be pointed out directly by her. Along with her death, I know that many working skill disappeared for ever. I cannot taste the salty vegetables that can only be prepared and make out by her. I believe that ancient human can beat and win the tiger and wolf, though the current people deny this with the current reality.

My daughter could crack inside kernel in melon seeds. But after she went to kindergarten, she ate the whole seeds with shell. She told me: “All my small friends in the kindergarten all eat the same way” Now, when she read ancient books, she signed that, ancient Chinese knew to crack the kernel of the melon seeds, but current people learn from others to eat the whole seeds. 

Chapter 82

I accompanied my colleague to Beijing, who had had leukemia and had stem cell transplantation for the treatment. We showed to other patients the successful results, which brought them extreme inspiration and courage to accept the stem cell transplantation.

I know however, not everyone would have the same good result with the stem cell transplantation. When my colleague got the diagnosis report, knowing that it is the worse type of the leukemia, we have no any lucky hope at all. She did only one chemotherapy before came into the stem cell transplantation. Our donation and the transplantation step the same time, for the whole treatment course. Other patients however, had chemotherapy repeatedly, exhausted almost all their body energy before their transplantation. How could the results be the same? So, the doctor said that my colleague was the best candidate for the transplantation.

I do not admit that I am a conservative, when I am now taking about the Chinese medicine. Whether I am a conservative or an extremist is not all depended on my human nature, but on my social status too. If I was birthed 100 years earlier, I would most be likely to cheer for the western medicine, as the Mr. Hu Shi[1]. When the things go to some phase point, there must be someone standing out to shout. I term this action as the self adjusting ability of human being.

Whenever I have to hand my self to my western medicine friends, I could also keep no blame as Mr. Liang Tichao, even if there was medical accident. My western medicine admired me very much for my attitude not suspecting them. I know, either the Chinese medicine, or the western medicine, both are groping to walk. No way to tell correct or wrong. No matter to treat the symptom or the cause of the diseased, whichever is the urgent mostly should be treated first. Chinese medicine also solve the symptoms. If the water in a pot is in spilling over the fire, it is also common to remove the fire away from under the pot. That I chose to use the western medicine, I mean to ask them to remove the symptom. How could I blame them not treat the course of my disease? Some people laughed at the Chinese medicine doctor who also goes to western medicine hospital to see doctor, they omit that they cannot find medical accident and conflict associated with the Chinese medicine doctor.

When my mother went to western medicine hospital to see a doctor, she was also a good patient. During her three year’s of paralysis on the bed, she used the therapies for both the symptoms and the cause of her disease.  My mother subscribed journal in the combination of Chinese medicine and western medicine. She had friend in western medicine. She consulted with them the therapeutic means, following them with the western medical means for the treatment. Mother drunk the herbs, but also had intravenous infusion of “calcium gluconate”. She discussed with me how to supply some iron. I said that the iron component cannot be extracted out by the way of cook common herbs.

Continuously I am warm to the scientific technique as my mother. My attitude is even more extreme than western people. For example, I oppose against the law that passed in many countries to forbid the study to clone human being. Can the development of science is stop by anyone? To restrict the study in the human clone will affect the whole development of life science. Under the condition that the society is harmony, I hope the science develops faster.

When I described to the son of my friend the “mineral radio” that I set when I was young, I said: “It is really a mineral!” My friend is a teacher in literature. She corrected my language error: “You said that it is a mineral radio, it would be a repeat if you say the true mineral again” I said that I wanted to emphasize that the science developed so fast. Nowadays, the child is used to the integrated plate, how could them image there is a big mineral stone in the radio? Seeing that the current children, when they assemble computer, only need to insert the parts together as they play the toy bricks, I envy them very much. On that early year, after I succeeded to assemble a five-tube and seven-tube ratio set, I wanted to assemble my TV set ambitiously. I brought a “ multiple-use meter” to see my physic teacher, asked him to choose a monitor to me. My teacher jumped up and said the manually twined deflection coil can not be used at all. I said, I can make it as good as made by machine. The teacher said it is impossible to mildly adjust the TV, even spend for several months. I said I have already made my mind to adjust it for one year… My teacher saw that he could not stop me, so he escaped on the half way.

I think, the reason that the science has such good condition and reputation today, would not be due to the fact that there have been so many warm-blood youth stick to the science research in the earlier years? Through the introduction from my mother and my grandmother, I know that the first group of western medicine doctors in China were those who are excellent people of good character and fine scholarship. The impact of western medicine to the Chinese medicine is not only the technique, but also those people full of youthful spirit and warm. It is due to the warm action of these youth to correct thing over much that caused the history goes in twist manner.

According to Chinese medicine, the herb has bias nature, so human being and the society. The material signaling shown by “Five-yun-six-qi” is shifted between the overwhelming and deficiency. If during the time of “5.4”[2], the social development of China needed to shift towards the western culture, it is time now for the eastern culture shift back, so to be able to develop further in a better way.

The bias of science is reflected very typically now in a scientist. He marks the western medicine and Chinese medicine. He marked the western medicine 90 but the Chinese medicine as 10. This way of marking things is very clear, it meeting the willingness of current people to know the truth. When I however tried to apply such marking method to expand to more other things or aspects, to mark the cow knife and the chicken knife; the plane and the train, the US and the China, the scientist and myself, the clear boundary of the “mark” not only disappears, but also inspires my confusion in thinking and dissatisfied in emotion. If I were the train being marked ten, should I ask the plane to transport the coal and steel? Could I develop the feeling to hate the train have no swing and envy the plane, and develop the emotion and mode of losing interest to work and slowing down the job passively? I would have had been a happy train, now I had no any active mode to work due to the marking.

Just because it is believed that things can be strictly marked, one is one, two would be the two, do not admit there is not certainty thing exist, not give space to human subjective ability, after having had such “scientific attitude”, one would ask doctor he could live for how long, after he got the diagnosis report for a cancer, since we believe the correct of science.

However, it was found in the quantum mechanics, due to the presence of some uncertainty, it is impossible to predict things completely. It means, science, as a future-telling man, cannot predict thing perfectly. This is as a go match, that looks no hope at all, that sustains by a small piece on the board; it is as the Red Army was forced into the grass field, the Chinese revolution came into a count down for death; as the Chinese medicine was declared again and again to die, it was refused out of the main stream of the medical system. Whenever we say the 1% of hope is just this little uncertainty. This uncertainty is just the holding spot for using a one pound of force to lift a stuff of thousands pounds. To try 100% of effort on the 1% hope, is the value of human active and initiative action. Once we can use this 1% possibility, it would as the Red Army went out of the grass field, as the dead go burns into victory, as the universe shift up and down and down to up completely. If we hold the “scientific attitude”, give up the 1% hope to try, where would be the colorful life of human being? Would such human life be the one we are chasing for? Under the condition in which there is uncertainty, why our trying to confirm it is not a scientific attitude?

Without the impact from western medicine, we would not consider what is Chinese medicine or what is not Chinese medicine. The re-evaluation to the western medicine would become possible until the science develops into some level. The western medicine and the Chinese medicine compare each other, try each other the advantage and disadvantage. Either the western medicine or the Chinese medicine can avoid its own “backward” or “predestined fate”. The meaning of  “predestined fate” in Chinese must not always mean death, but a serious of disasters it must face before, current and future, before it becomes the most powerful medical system for human being.

Chapter 83

Although Chinese medicine does not separate pediatric department, gynecology, internal medicine or surgical department…I predict that my daughter may develop into the area of women and children. If a man got sexual related disease, it is not quite possible for him to see a female doctor. My mother has no many patients with male diseases. There is one young boy. When he has had sex with his wife, he was scared by someone who run into the room. It was his mother who brought him to my mother for the treatment, but he always refused to lift his head during the treatment. There is also some case, in which it was the wife comes for a consulting, then brings the husband to come. The youth in our compounds may come to ask my mother something about sex, but there was very rare an adult make come for the same or similar reasons to my mother. Therefore, the choose of patients to a doctor also depends on the developing direction of a doctor.

The science in the western medicine always and continuously twists our realization of sex. Though the western medicine emphasizes the department separation, but it does not emphasize the sex of doctor and the patient. In gynecology and obstetrics, there are male doctors do exam and help birth and in male wards the nurses are more female. It is neither heard that it needs a male to insert catheter for male patients. Though there a difference in the male and female, there no such restriction at all in science. In a hospital, there is only male or female in physiology, but not in psychology. There are differences between the male and female in the outlook, but not in actual essence. In another word, no matter the doctor sees a patient, or a patient sees a doctor, both have no sense of sex difference. This is not hard for a doctor, but may not really be so for a patient.  

The extent without sex difference depends on the profession too. It is not easy to be followed by person out of that profession. Even for a male doctor who performs surgical operation for a naked female, he may not be able to describe the course of a sex intercourse with language. One time when we brought a rape criminal to the court, the criminal hesitated to tell out the course of the rape. The judge said his attitude was not good. From beginning I felt strange too, you did all the things, why you feel so hard to tell out? But when I had a look at the person in the court, I realized the reason. Though this is a case associated to private secrete, the court is not open to the public, the judge, the public prosecutor, the secretary, even the counsel, all are women. All women sat around a man and let the man describe the course of his rape. No strange that he felt embarrassed. So, I had to convince him, to regard this description as a patient tells his disease to a doctor, to tell out his story without emotional stress, so to get a better commend for his cooperative attitude…

For about 40 years, the best doctor in the gynecology and obstetrics in our city is male. I had more contact with him. When my friends or relatives met some trouble in women system, in birth giving, abortion, insert birth control ring, I would bring them to this doctor. His medical technique is excellent. After his retried, patients went to his home for help, that made the gynecology in the hospital short of patients. To solve this problem, when he was 70 years of old, a new coming young president of the hospital invited him back to work as a president of the gynecology and obstetrics department.

My nephew was birth at his home. It was a difficult birth. The male doctor wrote a paper, asked me to the hospital to call his female student doctor to come for help. The female doctor asked two male doctors came together. I asked her quietly why she called the male doctors. She said helping deliver is a work needing labor work. It is hard for ordinary female doctor. She has been exhausted before to faint. After they came, they injected ocytocin. The two male doctor pushed down the baby in turn until my nephew came out.  

If I bring my female friends to see a male doctor, and if they had emotional embarrass, hesitated to take off clothes if the doctor needs to have inside exam, I would shout to them: “Take is off! The Doctor only sees your disease, not your person!” When I have medical trouble, I also come to the male doctor. He usually answered my question while getting gloves on his hands to have inner vagina exam to me. I would ask him what kind of conditions he wanted to check. After he told me, I would say: “Please wait a movement” Then I would go to a female doctor to have the vagina exam, telling her what she needed to exam. After then, I went back to the male doctor with the results. The male doctor never got angry for my reaction. He always tried to help me. But my friends blamed me dealing with them with different manner. I really cannot tell why I myself cannot separate him as male and as a doctor. It is hard for me to smear off the sex difference.

I have had asked the male doctor how he became a doctor in the gynecology and obstetrics. He said he had worked in a military troop as a healthcare nurse before. Later, there was a chance to have continued education to be a doctor. Others chased to choose some departments. He was too honest to compete with others, so he was allocated to the gynecology and obstetrics. Heard this, I signed. If doctor could forget the sex difference, there would have had no little male doctor in the gynecology and obstetrics.

Among the medical conflict, some are associated with the sexually harass. I do not think that all are due to the over sensitivity of the patients who have psychology disorders, since I had the experience in which a male doctor kept touching my stomach. So, I doubted before if it is completely possible to ask a person with sex to perform no-sex job, even if it is for the sake of science.  Even if the one can, would it affect his/her personal nature?

When I was a matchmaker, I met someone who refused to date with people who work in hospital. They said the people working a hospital have less shaming essence, and less concern about sex difference. For this, we may laugh at the foolish of the public, but it is true that the science makes the people who conduct the scientific research some kind of diversity.

My grandmother told me a joke before. One day in the early last century, my grandmother visited her friend. Her husband was the early western medical doctor in China. My grandmother knew the old style deliver. There was a man hurried to my grandmother for help. But unfortunately she was absent. The western medical doctor said: “Let’s go, I can help you”  The man felt stunned: “Doctor, the person who needs deliver is a female!” The doctor said: “Oh, the one who needs deliver is a woman?” He put down the medical case and sat down again.

I met this doctor when I was young. I called him Jin grandfather. He had very strong science nature. My grandmother said, there were more Chinese medical doctors than the western medical doctors at that time. He opened a western medicine clinic. To be able to stand in the China lands, the doctor needed much stronger technique and very good medical moral. There was a girl living close to him and loved him very much. Day by day she stood under the window of the clinic watching him. The result was that she became disease-like. My Jin grandfather is western medicine. The feeling to science as to a religion made him have strong mind, but he could not, as mother did, to advice the girl’s mother to find a boyfriend for the girl. This made the girl, who just opened sex feeling but no way to release, went to Red zone to be a prostitute. I believed my grandmother’s story completely, since my Jin grandfather was more handsome than his brother – his brother is the earliest film king in China – Mr. Jin Yan.

My Jin grandfather’s father was the earliest western medicine in Korea 100 years ago. It is said that there is bronze statue in the current Seoul medical university garden. My Jin grandfather’s mother described to my grandmother when her husband graduated with Ph. Degree, the government stuff beat gongs to clear the way for him, lift him on chair, showing for three days. She was very proud for that. From this story, I know how attention the Korea government paid to the western medicine. At the same time in China, the public did not pay special attention to either the western medicine or Chinese medicine.

I do not doubt that one who holds a kind of religion like feeling to science could make himself exceed the sex difference. But is it reality to ask a man who regards the doctor as only a job to find a way of living, to exceed the sex difference? If he can exceed the sex difference, would it mean that he exceeds the human nature too? Would it be not proper to blame a man who exceeds the human nature so cares less the life?

Chapter 84

When I was scared when I was young, my mother would insert her fingers into my hair fondling: “Fine, fine, no worry, no worry…” I usually calmed down. This way has been past from generation to generation. I did so to my daughter, and would do the same way to my grandson. Such “calming” way used for children is not believed to be useful for adult, nor being a way of therapy.

A youth had poor sleep at night. I asked his mother to “calm” him, since he just participated in a operation of acting “death” to a criminal. I think that he was scared. For this, the young people laughed at me no reasoning. First, he refused to admit that he was scared. The evidence is his calm and quiet on the spot. Second, even if he was scared, he was no longer a child. How calm by mother would work? No matter how he thought, his mother accepted my suggestion with willingness.

One friend, more than 40 years of old, met a car accident. He acted very effectively, calling police, helping saving. He was excellent doing these. Later he got sick. He had poor appetite, chronic fatigue, poor sleep… Nothing was found wrong in hospital. Nothing works either, medication injection, taking drugs, etc. Seeing he was full of tiredness on his face, his wife was very worry, believing that he got some severe disease but it has not been detected out yet. She brought him to various hospitals, making him very nervous in emotion. One day, his mother, who was 70 years of old and lived in countryside, came to visit him. His mother asked him after seeing him: “You have blue tint on your nose stem. What scared you?” He and his wife felt very funny. It should be normal for an adult to meet and deal some uncommon things. With the support of reasoning, how could be scared? However, his mother insisted that he got scared and needed to call his spirit. So, in the deep night, she went out to the field, calling his name as she called him back to eat when he was young. She also fondling his hair as for a child, singing a song of “calming spirit”. Seeing his mother was so engrossed, he would like to act as a child, allowing his mother do what she wanted to do. When we met later, he had returned to his previous way of very active again. Friends asked how he was cured. After heard his story, we all admired the mystery of his mother’s spiritual calming. 

With the protection of reasoning, uncommon events do not expressed on our body as a scaring manner. This however does not mean that our emotion and spirit are not affected or impacted. I also show very calm in uncommon event, but later, those who showed scared, lost control of action, lost consciousness, usually returned normal, I however, felt tired more and more until my heart disease recurred.

“Mother” bears meaning not only in physiology but more in psychology. “Mother” can tear off the reasoning coat over our body, calm our heart directly. Reasoning can act as “father”, but not replace the “mother” No matter how “father” “teach” us, our heart still needs the calm from “mother” For this, the “calming” way for a child some times works very important role to an adult too.

I saw that my mother treated patient with spirit diverted due to scare. My mother used acupuncture and moxibustion very quickly and “calm” the patient too. After the patient finally cried out tiredly, in the chest of my mother, his emotion became calm gradually.

My mother usually used small skill in the treatment. When I was young and when I had spare time, mother would ask me to buy several pieces of bamboo, four cents in thick. I cut it open, make them into small cups of one inch high each. I boiled the bamboo cups in herbs. After mother insert the needle to the point, I would pick out the bamboo from the pot, swing little bit off the water, then hold it onto the needle. Mother also asked me to fold herb Aiye into a shape as cigarette, store them in a box nicely. She said, if there are patients with stomach pain, abdomen pain, bloating, hiccup, take out one, burn it, perform moxi therapy on the acupuncture point of “Zhusanli” and “Sanyinjiao” and other points. The problem would be ok without taking any herb therapy.

One year, my senior brother got acute appendicitis. After heard that doctor said he needed surgical operation, he tolled off the bed, escaped from the hospital with holding his abdomen. My mother was urgent, asked me to catch him to use acupuncture to him. But he crawled up to the top of the house. I could not catch him. At that time, there was no sugar cake to be used to “cheat” him to drink herbs. The whole family could only wait for him to fall down from the house after having the appendices broken. I discussed with my brother again and again. He only accept one therapy – moxi, which can only performed by me. He eventually did not have the surgical therapy. He did not eat drugs or have acupuncture. It was hard even for me to believe that moxi can be used to cure the appendicitis.  

The therapy used in Chinese medicine can be classified into small skill. A disease that can be cured, of course can not be regarded as severe disease. From this point, I do not oppose to say that Chinese medicine treat small disease. In psychology, we wish that the disease we got is a severe disease, some times. The one of my friends, whom I have mentioned before, later told me that, the reason for him not listened to me not to accept the surgical operation to cut one side lung, is to shown to others that his disease is really severe, to show that he did not pretend to be sick. A disease needing open-chest surgery is of course a severe disease. But in more times, we do not want us to get a severe disease, for example, if we get the diseases hat need to replace liver, kidney, or change bone marrow, etc. If we really get such disease, the first thing we may have to face is not the disease per se, but the much harder thing - the human nature.

One of my friend who have had severe surgical operation asked me to write an article to admire his wife, to express his thanks to her. I laugh them as to show. Would it really need to do so between a couple? He said, you do not know the reason. I saw many patients who were thrown off by another partner. In the ward, if the patient is accompanied by the parents, the brother and sister, but not all the partner, it means that the patient is thrown off by the partner. The beat from the being thrown is much heavy than the disease. I wrote this admiration article, but I also felt some sadness. The modern science technology in many aspects put human nature into a terrible test that has never had before in human history.

When one of my friends needed several tens of thousands dollar for surgical operation, his family fall silent. I “catch” them one by one, forced them to supply money. Could not refuse my question, his father said: “Could you ensure for us the surgery succeeds? If not, would it mean that you force us to break the whole family (in financial), with lose of both money and people? You donate ten thousand first, then come to force us”  I never transfer these words to this of my friend. If the parents feeling to child cannot bear such medical test, how could we ask the partner, the brother and sister do better way?

One day, I got a call from hospital. It said that one old hospitalized lady was thrown and left in the hospital by her children, since they were unable to pay the medical cost for her. The hospital asked to handle this issue, since I was a stuff who ensures the woman’s right. I tried a lot bring all of the old lady’s children together. By cheating and by convincing them, asked them to bring money to the hospital. The old lady did not feel happy or glad for my bring the money to her, but refused to eat and finally died. 

This makes me think, if the “treatment” is regarded so much so that it cannot be bear by loving feeling or family feelings, then the accept to death might be induced by some loss of hope. Though it has nothing to do with medicine, but it is needed to do some adjustment. How can we adjust it?

Chapter 85

A sick child took drugs for a long time. His mother saw that my daughter felt the pulse and the assessment was pretty correct, so she asked what else medicine he needed more. My daughter said, for so small child, why he needed to eat so many drugs? Do some massage, use some heat application, the results are usually pretty good enough. The body of small child is very sensitive. Improper use of drug is easy to damage it rather than to help it. So, it should be very careful to use medicine to a child. My daughter did some massage to the child when she was talking. Only for a while, the child felt very comfort. He told his mother that he liked such therapy very much.

Due to the coming of the western medicine, the concept for a doctor changed. Compared with the big surgical operation for transplantation of heart, liver, kidney or other organs, Chinese medicine doctor can not be regarded as a real doctor. For this, I do not oppose the comment that the Chinese medicine is a supplementary medicine. The achievement of Sun Wukong[1] on the road to Indian is huge, but would he be willing to carry the luggage on a carrying pole for two days?  Did he asked to kick off Sha Heshang, since he himself goes in front of the team to remove any obstacles for the team? I never believe that the Tang monkey is a lower lever leader. His “kindness” is rally a smart eye of science value. He did not deny one value with another value to allow finally there is only one value left. He did not apply the principle of “those with high ability to survive, and those who has less ability are depleted out”. He did not let Sun Wukong take all the interests. He refused and repelled Sun Wukong several times away of the team, but never kicked other member of the team out. He would rather risk to be eaten by monsters, than allow Sun Wukong’s emotion to control the whole heaven.

It is not the defect of Chinese medicine for its no competition motion. It is neither the reason to deplete it from the medical system. I worked in a women organization for some times. Before I went to it, I was advised that, it has a lot of trouble with many women in a group. They have conflict each other very easily. The inner condition of the organization approved this comment. After conversion for some time, I found that the problem is not on the sex, but the improper allocation of staff. Since there was less chance for a woman to promote, those who promoted were all as “Sun Wukong”. If a Tang Monk brings three “Sun Wukong” to the west to get Buddhism literatures, what would happen?

Someone laughed at the Chinese medicine and suggested to have a competition with the western medicine, to decide which one should be kept to develop. They think that this is very fare and pretty science. I think that such science is not as reality as the “kindness” of the Tang Monk. From this point of view, I suggest to have moral, to “combine” the western medicine and the Chinese medicine into the “serve the people”. Due to the block between the professionals, people would almost to launch a “Holy War” due to the difference in thinking. Only when moral has a common value, it can conduct the associated part each other. Therefore, moral is not a void or a hollow thing. It is not produced to make people royalty. Its value is no less than medicine.

I think that, it is the basic attitude to realize the different value of different things, to understand that no any thing has exclusiveness. The Chinese medicine is established on this attitude. In Chinese medicine theory, nothing is absolute, Yin-Yang, Five-element, and many others. Nothing is not in a course of development and movement.

I did not take medication when I get common cold. For this, I got criticized. I did not take medication when I coughed. My friends said that it would cause other diseases. As they said, I started to have swollen, sour lower back… My friends said it was the symptoms for kidney infection. I however still did not take any medication. Several days later, the swelling disappeared, so did other symptoms. On the other side, my friend took medication, had intravenous infusion, had increased amount of the medication after he had cough and had bacteria culture. He told me, the development of the disease must be stop on its way. The result is, he did not stop the disease in the lung but in the kidney without exit. The lab test report showed that he really got nephritis. Of course, it is not a mild disease. It needed to be treated seriously. He felt strange for this. For me, I got the symptoms for nephritis but did not get the nephritis actually. For him, he tried every step to prevent to be nephritis, but he got it. What’s the reason? I said, when I cough, my common cold disappeared. When I had swollen, my cough stop. When my swollen disappeared, all other symptoms in my body disappeared. The reason is: when the disease went a full round in my body, it was no longer a disease. You did not allow it to go a full course, but stop it in the phase of kidney. Now, treat your nephritis with patience. Seeing he was very depressed, I advised him take it easy, if he repeat the thing, would he have braveness as I did? It is one of the reasons the “risk” manner of the Chinese medicine, that the current people feel hard to accept it. Though there is risk in the western medicine too, people have freedom to choose it with risk in mind.

The Chinese medicine not only does not look things in an exclusive way, but also not to look itself in an exclusive way. Therefore, from history, Chinese medicine never stop to check, review and criticize itself. This phenomenon was regarded by someone to prove that the Chinese medicine has no enough solid reasoning. It also makes some scholar confused.

One internet friend wrote a letter and said: ginseng cannot be taken in a large dose, but he dared to eat it as turnip. However, he said it depends on the way to eat it. It needs to be eat little bit by little bit, to increase the endurance of the body, then it would have no problem to risk life to eat a large dose once. I agree with him completely. The slanting nature of the herbs and the slanting of person is a relative concept. If in the Galaxy there is another “earth”. It has everything as in our earth but cabbage, and if they come to our earth as guest, they may get poison after eat our cabbage. If the ginseng was everywhere on the earth, it was the main dish of our ancestors, they have had tolerated all of the poisoning from the ginseng, then when we eat it now, it would be as a turnip. On the contrary, if the turnip is as rare as the ginseng from history, we may get poison form it if we eat it now.  

This relativity applies to the western medicine. It is approved by the fast change of the generations of antibiotic. From this point of view, many so called new development or creation of the western medicine is as just walking in the same spot to maintain the healing effect. Therefore, in our Chinese medicine, when we start the medication, using herbs, the time and the territory, all of such factors must be considered together. Sometimes, I have joke with my friends, you don’t need to take medicine. You only need to come to live in my home for sometimes, eat our meals rather than your current ones, you would be able to get better as taking medications. That a couple get the same disease approves what I mean here.  

The harmony of the Chinese medicine makes it possible that, no matter how to use its own spear to stick its own shield, it could avoid to miss into conflict or contradictory. Those who feel confused are those who fail to understand the nature of the Chinese medicine. If we hold the “spear and shield” of the Chinese medicine, but forget and throw its “the way to solve the conflict” aside, and if we fix the Chinese medicine in a given time and space but omit its history before and after that time and space, then the spear of the Chinese medicine will stick broken the shield of the Chinese medicine. This is just the common way in current time, people use it to criticize the Chinese medicine.

To me, it does not mean that I must defense the Chinese medicine but that the way to criticize the Chinese medicine should be as for any element in the five elements system, in which every element needs to be promoted but also to be inhibited by other elements, so to make it in balance. The spiritual nature of the “five elements” is democracy. Such democracy thinking can prevent the science not develop into a monster.

Chapter 87

I accompanied my friend to see Chinese medicine, after she finished the consultation, she want to compare with me. She hold my hands and told the Chinese medicine doctor: “Please see her too” The doctor felt my pulse and said: “the sprit is hold in but the courage is evaporated”. Heard this, I smiled but said nothing. My friend felt terribly scared. She wanted to ask the doctor more. I pulled her out. She looked at me whole body, with a strange feeling on her face: “This doctor is very correct. He indeed said that your courage has been evaporated out”. I told her that that doctor did not talk nonsense. I felt that the word “the encourage has been evaporated out” described my condition precisely. My friend asked me: “What does it mean?” said that I cannot explain it clearly, but I now felt that I have no feeling to time and space. I thought that means the “evaporation of the encourage” by that doctor.

My friend cannot understand what’s feeling for the loss of time and space. I tried to explain to her: have you ever had a experience in which you had a sleep, after waken up, you cannot realize what’s the time at that movement and did not know where you are? She said she had it before. I said, such condition usually lasted for only several seconds. If such condition continues for several days or tens of days, would it be called the evaporation out of the encourage? She said: “Wouldn’t you now realize where you are and if it is in the morning or at night?” I said I know, but I feel not confirmed. That’s why I always look at the watch, the street plates around and need to check with my friends and relatives to confirm. She startled and said: “Would you see me not real?” I said: “I see you not only as with a block as a mountain, but hear your voice as blocked with a film. Even I see myself as see another person.” My friend said: “Ai, your condition is very severe, but I see you are pretty normal” I said: “Of course I am ok. Didn’t you heard that doctor said: my spirit is in hold?” She asked how such a condition comes. I said, if I know, I would let it happen as such. She said, then we should go to the doctor to find the reason. I said that the doctor will say that it is due to overtired that exhaust the libido and blood. The therapy would be supply more blood and Qi; the western medicine would say that I have mental disease but not know the reason or mechanism for it, nor have proper medications for it.

She felt worry and felt it is scaring. With more think, the mental disease is also scaring. It must be treated. She suggest me to see the Chinese medicine first. I am not hurry to see a doctor. Not to speaking that a disease has its own course of development, it should be allowed to develop some steps further, if it is possible. For human, it is not means no need to experience and to feel the disease status. Why someone felt mad when faces death? Probably it is due to he never experience the strange body feeling before death.

Why there are so many people chosen suicide? Probably it is because they can not accept the strange feeling of body. We normally separate the feeling as “normal” and abnormal”. The “normal” feeling is not only our certificate to live, but also the weapon to criticize the “abnormal”. So, it is more terrible and dangerous to deny this emotional status than the “abnormal” feeling per se. This makes people not only refuse to experience the abnormal feeling, but also try to refuse it by giving up life.

From the plenty of description of the spirit and encourage in the Chinese medicine literatures, I think, the life environment of ancient Chinese made them also have such “loss of spirit and disappear of encourage” experience. There should have much more chance for them to have such experience. So, the ancient Chinese could not only deal with such condition in a calm manner, but also found out the methods to solve such a problem. The coming of psychology makes us throw away the “valuable secret” that the ancient ancestors left for us. The knowledge of psychology has no help for us to understand the suicide people’s emotion, nor help to prevent their suicide.

Currently, the depression is as a cancer: once found, it has already been in a later stage. The function of the psychology makes us accept other’s suicide with our calm motion. Would our cool emotion reflect some kind of shortage in our heart and emotion? For me to have such loss of encourage condition, aside due to my over exhausting, I felt that there is some other reasons, that I cannot find it from rational level, and my consciousness cannot scan it out.

The “loss of encourage” created me a chance and tool to explore myself. I want to take this chance to search every corner of my body and spirit, to find the position of the “broken layer”. Human, why it needs lonely? It needs to stay itself, to communicate and to find the signal send out by the body. It is the need to “explore”. For this, I know that some one builds up rich spiritual life is not for being a sage, or a wisdom person, but for self adjustment. Therefore, a sage win himself is not to showing an example for the public, but to get rid of hit own embarrasses. It is meaningless to deny the effort of a sage and to approve his hypocritical by finding error from his body. I told my daughter, it is not a way to make people get advanced.

My friends felt very strange: “You are so calm in front of stress. You could keep calm even the Mountain Tai falls broken away. Even if we all get mental disease, you would not. How could you get such loss of encourage?” I said, too calm may not be a good thing either. Too solid is not a good thing for a building, what about to a human being? The result is broken if everything is too solid without bend.

The willing wants to broken, but the “encourage” does not. The loss of encourage can be said the body symptom, but it might a reflection of my life condition. This is just the reason that I do not want to solve the symptom urgently. My friend said with smile: if you are mayor, would your loss of encourage reflect the problem of this city? I smiled too and said: probably. Would you do think that the spiritual condition of Prime minister Zhou reflected the social condition at that time? 

When loss the feeling of time and space, I need lonely feeling to connect with my own body, I also need my relatives to adjust my position. One friend had superstition to psychology doctor. She went to Beijing, spent eight thousands dollars with a psychologist for “talking therapy”. When she came back, she was very disappointed. She said she would have spent such amount of money on “collective talk” to get better result. So I think, the life style of western people to keep private secret makes them depend on psychologist. The life style of Chinese to communicate with others, the so called “bad habit”, makes us easy to learn from others: using others as our mirror. These mirrors not only help us to wash face, but also pour light beans to our heart.

On a party, I and my colleagues had a drinking game: everyone invited you a cup of wine (liquor) and tell out one defect of yours. If you deny it, you need to drink a cup of penalty. Whether the defect pointed out is correct or not, is adjusted by all others. I thought, the inviting wine needed to be drunk, and the penalty wine might not be drunk, since whoever has no such tolerance to criticize? However, I saw that, my colleagues, one by one, drunk the penalty wine. The defects pointed out are precisely correct, but none of them admit it. All of them could not prevent from denying. When it was my turn, when I heard my defects, I laughed, I felt they are not correct at all. I though, without my denying, others would refuse these proposed defects and gave me a fare adjustment. To my surprise, they all nod and agreed. I felt angry. I felt this is a plot. How could you all do this way just for pushing me to drink more wine? So, I taped the table and complain… the results are: all criticized me until I could say nothing but drunk the penalty wine utterly convinced. 

This is as that the person standing aside has clearer view. Others can usually see your defects that you cannot see by yourself. Your friend who know you and who understand you are more helpful than the professional knowledge of a psychologist. Compared with the woman I saw when I was young, the current women have no little way of getting into a huff or putting on a show of bad temple. The scale of the exam, the recruit, and the promotion all fixed the human being into fixed manner, straight standing. The way of medicine that treat the headache if there is headache fixes all position in the body that has chance to bend. There is no “bending” action to divert the pushing force from outside, the life would have only had to “broken”. So, the psychology that “solve” the “bend” would has to sole the “broken”. For this, the psychology became more and more profound. 

Chapter 88

I had a dream. I dreamed a man criticized me. His convince was so strong that I felt as I understood and realized the things suddenly and very clearly. At the time when I felt I was much clear for the point, admired to him very much, I also felt I was nothing, felt self inferior and depression. After waking up, I still felt depression. My daughter said: “I never see a person who is so good at create depression. You cannot realize that the man in the dream to criticize you is yourself. It seems that you need personality assembling. In deed, the points used by the man in the dream are supplied by myself! This made my very happy. But how my own concept became other’s in the dream? And I became be criticized? Would it be, as my daughter said, to keep the long habit of being self inferior, I make the “original myself” into others to “admire”?

I defense my self that it was the specific emotion in a specific environment. For hundred of years, the main emotion in the Chinese is lack of confidence. In the conflict condition between the eastern and the western culture, the original self and the current self cannot recognize each other. It is not only me who has such emotion embarrasses. If we need to assembling them together, it needs all of us assembling together. The older I am, the more I understand what means the Mr. Q. I really do not want to admit there is such an original self. It has to be assembled. Especially in current, it is too embarrassing. Who does not want to live in a easy way? What about as Faust to give up himself to a devil? What about to be a Mr. Q, to cheat himself and cheat others? It does not mean we did not do so before. Chinese would feel headache to see a devil too.

Chinese is not blank paper, so they are not pure in spirit. For example, if foreigner opposes Chinese medicine, they may eat the ginseng as turnip. Such hypocritical can be seen in those who are fully westernized. Since, if you are Chinese, you cannot get rid of China through opposing China. My grandmother said, Japanese invader never trust the Chinese traitor. It is not easy to let Chinese as “good people”, since they cannot believe in anything fully with heart. It is not easy either to let Chinese as terribly bad people, their kindness would turn back again when they are too bad to some extreme. During the time when the Japanese invader controlled the China, my grandmother hided five escaped soldiers from puppet army. But when the Japanese gave up and escaped, she brought a basket of pancakes to send to them.

My friend said, the Chinese heart is not on the government, but in a wild. So, to criticize the government’s Confucianism does not shack off the base of the Confucianism. People is used to believe that it is Goethe who created Faust. They believe that it is Goethe’s freedom to create whichever creature. But Mr. Jung said it is the Faust who creates Goethe. It is due to the self of Faust, that pushes Goethe to improve itself up until the Faust get good fate. So, to create Faust is the “dedicated and decided fate” of Goethe. Tagore said: “It is the world spirit to come in that beat my heart window, or it is my spirit that wants to go out?”

The sky, the land, and the human, the thinking of the whole entity is created by Chinese. It is also “the reflection of the outside world in the human brain”. Though it cannot be painted as a new picture, the spirit can respond to the calling from the outside. During the thinking movement of such echo reaction from inside and outside, it is impossible for Chinese to neglect such willingness of the original self to “re-see the world”. Such “programmed fate” cannot be avoided by selling the spirit to the devil or act as the Mr. Q. When we suggest to throw away the traditional culture, did we remember that we are not only the sufferer of the culture, but also its creator? So, if the culture needs to be killed off, it is not enough to just “burn the books”, but also need to “kill the scholars”.  

I am not going to defense and advocate the Chinese medicine or Chinese culture. How could I not know the advantage of the western medicine and the western culture? I am a situational ethics. If the western medicine and the western culture can be used directly and if it works, why we try so hard, bearing the self inferior feeling, to try hard to find the best way by ourselves? The hundred of year of history to learn from the western makes us lose the original aim of learning. If the outside failed to wake up the inside, the Chinese would keep in “sleep”. Mr. Q is the Chinese, who lost self, separated personality, with spirit nowhere to touch, and walking in a dream. 

It is right to say that Mr. Q has not been awaken. Without calling his encourage back, how could he wake up? Many people doubt that the Chinese culture suffered from heart failure, doubt its value, suggest to change a heart. The power of the Chinese hear indeed is not as strong and western culture heart. Chinese culture is short of the separation power, religion power, tragedy motion and hero spirit of the western culture, all of which are needed to create great “potential” movement. The self satisfaction of the Chinese causes the “apathy” of the Chinese in spirit.

Many of my daughter’s art teacher felt pity for her not go to the road of art. I also feel strange, how she resisted against the dream to be a star? She told me, she loves art. But if she did not meet the Chinese medicine, she must have been to the art. She said: “Art needs pain to nourish, and with life to sacrifice. It can be approved by the difficult life of the artists, short life of rock musician. There is side effect of art to human being too. It is the Chinese medicine that allows me to enjoy the art with out suffering its side effect…” Considering that some people are trying to find the reason for the backward of Chinese art, I found the answer from my daughter. Neither my daughter nor I measure the heart only by its power.

Athletics have hidden problem in their heart, and the life span of man is shorter than woman. Nourishing heart is more important to the heart. I think that not great the Chinese medicine is not its mistake, as we should not regard the eyes of a blind is defect sine his hearing ability is excellent. From time to time, my friends may accuse me to weak. They may abuse me being Mr. Q. I admit: “I am that ugly Chinese”.

Applying “Stimulating method” by swearing at somebody usually does not work for those of people whose thinking is in a self satisfaction, since the “Fire” excited is depleted off by “Soil”, counteracted by “Water” and exhausted by “Metal” in the flow of the five elements, so it is hard to form angry Fire to push the person to act. Therefore, Chinese are relatively less aggressive, less action and less completive. Such national nature is under criticizing now. The reason that the Chinese medicine is associated with the Chinese culture is that, the Chinese medicine includes the sky, the land, and some more concepts into the medicine for human. A young goy said, when he was learning an ancient zither, why there were so many story and talking about playing the instrument?  I said, you would have had contacted with the Chinese culture, you would not feel it hard to learn the zither.

Chinese culture is a serious of systems. No matter which door you open, you would come into the same room. Einstein failed to open and connect the all rooms of the different departments of western culture. For Chinese characters, without increase any new word, the characters available are enough to express the meaning of new concept. During construction of a new theory, if there is any missing parts, then along with the development of this department, the creation of any new element my break the current relationship between concept, so causing new allocation or classification. Such totally broken and re-organization might be called as a development or progression, it can also be called as the concept re-new, or correction. For the Chinese medicine however, it is not allowed.

Why my mother gave me a lot of classical books/literatures in Chinese medicine? Since if not master the Chinese medicine from the whole view, but only from a local part to learn the Chinese medicine, I would most possibly renew my concept again and again. How would the patients not be treated by me with the tomorrow’s old concepts? If this correction or renew of the concept is totally completed, would the patients not be treated turn and toss? If the correction is false, would the therapy used today not be pseudo-science tomorrow? If the Chinese medicine really does so, it would need to create a set of “science’ theory to support its way. The Chinese medicine can not keep the same step of the time, can not keep the “potential” created by the hero western medicine. The “potential” has changed the nature, including human being, the part of the nature.

The human being faced by current medicine is no longer “natural human being”. The road on which a disease comes is a twisted and twisted mountain road. This has not been recognized by western medicine yet. So, in the book of the current western medicine, it is written: “the reason for the disease is not clear. The mechanism for it is not clear yet” I think, the medical research needs not the samples that have not been contaminated. For the current “task”, it is needed to solve it out of the current “time”.

Chapter 89

If the concept of health of Chinese medicine has never appeared in history, would it be suggested by the western medicine one day? When the western medicine proposed the “Chinese medicine” theory as a new theory, would people feel hard to understand? Some one may oppose that, how could western medicine suggest a “Chinese medicine” theory? The Chinese medicine and the western medicine are two different medical systems, no compatible each other, so no possibility to connect each other. For this comment, I don’t agree. Who said that a new theory must be compatible with the exist one? The Classical mechanics, the general relativity and the quantum mechanics, are they compatible? No limiting board for science. Not compatible is not only allowed in the science, but it is also the expression of the expansion force of the science.  

It is described the science is developing always according to one theory, so to blame the Chinese medicine not logic. It is described as the science would had the “unified field theory” quite long time ago, and as all theories are included in one unified field theory based on a cause-result mechanism, so the Chinese medicine can be excluded off the field. Otherwise, what’s the science reason to ask the Chinese medicine to be compatible to the western medicine? The occurrence of the quantum mechanics does not deny or replace the classic mechanics. Rather, they work in different area. People do not deny the usefulness of the classic mechanics in production of a car for its not applicable in the production of nuclear bomb. Since the “unified field theory” has not been developed out, every part holds truth, who indeed has the right to deplete and cancel the Chinese medicine?

The Chinese medicine now gets a new life power. If the presence and the development of the Chinese medicine before is the historical need, now, its life power comes from the space that is left along by the development of the western medicine. Even if the Chinese medicine does not come to fill this space, some other similar medical system will be developed to fill it. This is the way by which the science develops. Even apparently not compatible things are not really and absolutely not compatible. The compatible of the thinking has its own physiology basis. In this question, we can follow the natural law. The personality of my mother and my father is very different. For example in the idea for rich and money, they are not compatible. My father is stingy but my mother is generous. As their child, what I would get their inherit? There would have only three possibility: first, as my father, extremely stingy; second, as my mother, very generous; third, compatible the personality of my mother and father, not so stingy or generous. The only impossible result is: stingy but also generous, since it is illogical.

However, the illogical thing happens. I am very stingy but also very generous. My colleague cried out in alarm to my subconscious behavior: “Why you add water into ink?” My leader also felt very angry to me: “We have nice paper. Why you always use the used paper and write report on the paper back to me?” My friends said: “Why whenever we suggest to throw away a dish that has fall into sour, you would eat it all?” I cannot answer these questions. On the other hand, my generousness exceeds my mother a lot. I not only give out all what I have, but I could also borrow money on behind of others to sign on the borrowing receipt. So, some offices would like to send the survival money to me, depend on me to allocate it out.

Psychology doctor may think that this is my conflict personality. To me, it is pretty normal actually, since if I am not stingy, the father part in my body will feel discomfort, which needs me care every mild thing, not waste any thing, big or small. In the same way, if I do not spend money to help others, not help others if I can help them with money, the mother part in my body would feel discomfort. Therefore for me to live easy, being able to eat and to sleep well, I must be both stingy and generous. No any part can be neglected.

So, the chain of the gene does not link as our understanding. The apparently conflict personality is unified in my body perfectly. The gene combined in my body comes from my direct ancestors thousands of generations. From gene point of view, I am them, and they are me. But I do not own these ancestors exclusively. From my blood system reverse up not far, I would catch cross with the ancestor of other people. My grandmother’s mother might be your grandmother’s mother-in-law. Vertically, from many and many of your previous ancestors, you can find all the gene currently in your body. In another word, they are the generations of your life. Horizontally, the gene of current people came from your ancestors. So, you can also find all of your gene from current people. We can say that, our current people share the live generations by generations. We so exist currently and historically. If we really inherited in such way, then, what thinking manner is really not compatible? Of course, human being does not become a flock of sheep without personality due to the compatible gene mixing. On the contrary, once the individual thinking style is formed, it expresses very strong independent and self-protection realization. Without very strong feeling power it would not open. A compatibility against willingness would cost the damage of the body health.

It can be said, it is due to the feeling of the human being that protected the independency of thinking. So, we can understand why human has rationing but also keeps feeling. The two have been bind together. If the conflict in thinking cannot be solved logically, if it cannot be solved, as the Buddhism suggested to “leave it going naturally”, it needs to be solved with breaking through and overcoming manner. But, what’s the breaking through and overcoming manner? After my marriage, I am not compatible to my father’s family in many thinking. That I tried my best costs my health in body and in heart. After my daughter’s birth, I found surprisingly: my daughter’s thinking manner, the value desire, the behavior in speaking and action, all are as copied from her father’s family. I am amazed: my abdomen was borrowed to give a birth of other family’s baby! But the God designed that I love my daughter without any condition.

Daughter is a gobbledegook (heaven book). I watched her and felt strange. I cannot understand her behavior. Then I re-paid attention to her father, tried to carefully understand his thinking, feeling, personality, and nature. Faced to his surprise, I answered, you are a dictionary. I accompanied her grandfather and grandmother to chat, tried, from their point of views, to look a this world. I told my daughter, I am checking a dictionary. Of course, I have also tried to understand as far as the history of my husband’s family tree. This is to check an origin of phraseology. It is through these checking, I can then understand my daughter.

Some times, I joked with my daughter. If daughter is the product of one-night love, it would be worse, since I would never be able to understand her, since I have no dictionary to help me to read her, the heaven book. From this point of view, I oppose one-night love. It is just due to my daughter, I cannot deny the family from which she comes. Therefore, for the thinking manner that I originally not agree, what I need is not to deny, to oppose, to avoid, or to refuse, but to try compatible with it. There is no problem of against-willing. When my daughter opened the block of two families, I signed: “Huang being really needs sexual multiplication!”

Love, this word is not very theory, not at all true, not at all logic and cannot bring it to the open discussion. But, it is the manner and way that helps me to reach the break overpass in thinking. That human is an animal with feelings, with thinking, is due to the combination of these two. Would it be due to the current people is short of feeling power so the current people is hard to break the jail frame of the thinking? When the feeling of love becomes not solid, the power of thinking becomes weak too.

Someone laughed at me, that I protest the Chinese medicine is for my feeling to my mother and my daughter, that I stick to Chinese culture, and that it is due to national feeling. For this, I have no objections, since I am not living myself this one generation, but many generations of myself. The open, compatibility, and alive of my reasoning cannot sustain without my feeling to act as pioneer and power for move. I cannot love the truth without my body flesh and blood. Is this hard to understand?  

Chapter 90

When I was young, we always ate old, saved surplus grain. The government saved the new harvested grain to eat next year, fearing that there might be a short-of-grain disaster if there is no harvest next year.  At that time, the China was around by other counties against China, nowhere to find grain support. The saved grain goes more of less moldy. There were two years in which we always ate the moldy grain. It was more severe with moldy in corn. It became red in color, tasted pricy, hard to eat. But every family eat the same. Previous years, there was a saying that the moldy corn contains a fungus called aflatoxin, which is a strong cancer-inducting material. Even heating would be able to kill it. Once find it in grain, the grain should be destroyed. After fear, I started to recall the neighbors at that time, who died of cancer. I tried to recall again and again, but can not recall any. So I doubt this aflatoxin might not be so terrible. Seeing that people throw away the grain that contains little bit moldy, I felt pity.

Chinese is the nation that suffered hungry before. Chinese have been so hungry so that even at this time, you can see fermented tofu, soy juice, sour vegetable, smoke meat, moldy vegetables, wind-dried intestine, and preserved eggs on the dining table of Chinese family. Certainly, they are all degenerated food. When I was young, I followed my grandmother to prepare soy sauce. We put tofu on shelves to dry. After several months, took it down to open it, to wash… In the soy sauce, there was not only moldy, but also maggot shell. So I have had a time to refuse to eat soy sauce. But my neighbors all came to ask a taste of the new sauce, that they admired a lot. I thought, the eating of the degenerated food, it is a obligation at beginning, and a habit later. No matter how nice it tasted, the degenerated food is not at all as good for health as fresh food. I really doubt if the degenerated food still contain nutrition.

Along with the reform in China, the concept about food changed. People chase for not only taste good, but also fresh. They eat less degenerated food. After 30 years, those Chinese who do not eat degenerated food have higher and higher, even doubled, incidence of cancer. Today, I saw a TV news that the incidence for lung cancer increased 465%. All agree that it is due to the contamination of environment. In this way, would the cancer-inducing power of the environment is stronger than the aflatoxin? The report also said, the cardiovascular disease has become the number one reason for the death of Chinese. There are 1.8 billion Chinese with hypertension. I thought, it must not due to the eating of aflatoxin. High quality food makes the people with higher blood pressure, the degenerated food has however less power to increase people’s blood pressure. The food with high nutrition contains high heat, along with less body movement, the high nutrition food brings to the people not the healthy, but “Fire”. If the “Fire” accumulated for a long time, there would have trouble.

One of my friends was very nervous to this. She said: “My son got sour throat again!” I said: “What about it happens again?” She said: “It would cause nephritis”. She said precisely correct. She son got disease as she predicted. The son has allergy to penicillin. She brought him to provincial hospital, had penicillin a movement with anti-allergic infusion. After two weeks, the doctors said it has to be stop, suggesting them back home to have a break. My friend said: “But there is still blood in urine?” The doctor said, there would be blood even if it is cured from now for the following half year. The doctor then prescribed medications to them to go home. A lot of medications, all are Chinese medicine, but prescribed by a western medicine doctor, to clear Fire and detoxify. My friend strongly believed that the reason was due to the inflammation in the throat, so keep asking her son to take the Chinese medicine. But the blood in the urine only increased not decreased. She was nervous as if she herself got obsessive-compulsive syndrome. She let the repeated lab test every two days, and looked at the urine bottle of her son every morning. Later, even she herself can tell out the amount of protein and red blood cells in the urine through looking at the urine.

I know the body constitution of his son. There is not the Fire in the body at all. She should not continue the cleaning Fire therapy. I suggested her to bring her son to a Chinese medicine doctor. But my daughter’s maser went out for traveling, not present. So she found another two Chinese medicine doctors. But these two doctors were also recommending the clearing Fire. When we consulted with another Chinese medicine doctor in another city, he agreed with me. So She brought her son there. After back, I had a look at the medicine. All are Cold herbs again. I said, how this doctor did not agree with me either? The friend said, the doctor believed it was too much Fire in the body. It had to be cleared. So many doctors, used both western medicine and Chinese herbs, all used Cold herbs. My friend also believed that her son has strong Fire. She started the Cold herb again. But the lab test made her as ants on hot pot. 

My daughter’s master came back. My friend came to him in a hurry. She went back to me: “Dr. Hao also sued Cold herbs!” After open the herb package, I cannot prevent from laugh: “They are Cold herbs? No any Cold herb. There is also red ginseng. This is a warm supplication therapy” My friend said: “I told him that my son has Fire, which always cause sour throat and nephritis. The doctor said, well, well, clearing Fire, clearing Fire” I said, he saw fifty to sixty patients a day. Get tired to death. How could he have time to convince you? He followed you in mouth, but the treatment is still according what he thought to be. After twenty days taking the herbs, everything is cured.

My friend felt strange: “The doctor in the provincial hospital said there would have the blood in the urine for half year, how it disappears now?” I said, if the disease is cured, why it should still have blood? My friend now care much about the diet of the whole family, not only the nutrition, but also the Cold and Hot nature of the foods. Whenever I went to prison, I paid attention to the diet of the prisoners. Their diet manu is of scientific value. It pays attention to the fined and original grain, the meat and the vegetable. If such diet manu is adapted to the public, the incidence for the cardiovascular diseases must reduce dramatically. The prisoners have physical exercise everyday, have some other physical movement, the amount of their physical movement is also pretty proper. They practice meditation, learn sew and knit, also learn Confucianism. I joked with them sometimes, the scientific life style now is in the prison. I worry, if the prisoners are really changed into a honest persons, would they look at us out of the jail as we are rude savages? If we pay attention to the life style, the cardiovascular disease should not be the number one killer to human.

My colleague’s mother died of brain bleeding. She was very saddened and cried: “My mother is not happy. She liked TV very much. I have just installed a net TV for her for three days before she died. “ As Mrs. Xiang Ling, she repeated this every days. After one month, I told her: “If you have had not installed that net TV for her, to make her sit there without movement for three days, she would have not died.” She was stunned. After a while, she said: “It is me who hurt my mother! I should have not had her have this happiness!”

If according to previous life style, there would have no question that her mother may live for additional tens of years. But sitting continuously for three days caused her having bleeding in brain to die. For those who have continuous physical activity, the body Qi and blood has been designed and adapted according to the need of the physical activity. Without movement for three days, the body energy could not be released out. The blood pressure therefore increased. For old person, with hard in blood vessels, it can not be avoided to have health trouble.

Several days ago, we went to a mountain. A young boy of twenty years of old, climbed for only several minutes before stop. He said: “I cannot climb any more. I feel hot. The heat in the body appears hard to evaporate out. I felt as to explode.” All laughed at him. Someone encourage him continue. I did not push him to try again. I know that he eat a lot usually, has enough heat in the body. The heat has been overwhelming in the body. With little bit physical movement, the heat would be much higher. If it is not removed out of the body in time, he may also have trouble.

Chapter 91

Science defense person have severely said, the Chinese medicine has no qualification to ask tolerance of science. It is as the lecture room of a university can be given to a witch to use? How a witch has quality to ask equal with science? One of the most important tasks for science is to struggle against pseudo-science as Chinese medicine. To me, not allowing Chinese medicine into the science hall as not allowing Mr. Yuan Longping[1] being the fellow of Science institute of China. It does not relate to whether the Chinese medicine is a medicine or not, not whether Mr. Yuan Longping is a scientist or not, it is a question that what the science per se believed it is.

Think about it: in the beginning, the Chinese medicine started and developed without any help form science. That Mr. Yuan Longping studied the rice hybrid is due to his break off the science. If the science cannot tolerate small stream, it means it has no desire to be a sea. Then it does not matter if the Chinese medicine cares not such a low level knowledge system. No worth to respect it. In current time, people worry to kill mosquito since the killing my damage the environment and ecological balance. How the Chinese medicine becomes an absolute harmful thing, which needs the science to bend it body and rush out to kill the Chinese medicine? Someone also said that, the science does not come from the eastern, so they commented again and again that the Chinese people and the western is not in the same level, so they summarize that the Chinese nation is a low level nation. For this, it is no longer a science question.

To me, if you want to find a reason supporting that Chinese should be depleted out of the earth, you first of all need to approve that Chinese is gorilla. But, the wisdom of Chinese in mathematics is most excellent in the world. It means that the human wisdom does not always need to be kept through science. Between based on human, or based on science, no matter how great the science, it should base on human. The human wisdom per se is science. We are not trying to study the rationality of human thinking, but trying to change human thinking. It tosses the world up and down.

One day when my daughter was in kindergarten, her teacher talked to me very formally, that my daughter had some problem in her wisdom. I felt pretty surprised. How I could not find this problem by myself? The teacher said, you daughter cannot understand addition. Back at home, I picked out a box of match to my daughter. She really could not add it! This really scared me. To make me quiet, I brought my daughter out to see moon. When came back, I changed the way to test her. Now I felt easy. She indeed did not know the addition, but she knew subtraction. Ancient people might not know how much apples they picked, but they knew if the apple was steal. If the teacher taught her the subtraction first, she would have not believed she had trouble in wisdom.

When my daughter went to elementary school, the teacher told again, she does not know multiplication. I told her, to teach my daughter division first. We feel that the current teaching sequence is very rational, one by one, very logic. But in fact, it may not be so. The human thinking always goes back to its own way from time to time, so it could meet conflict with science sequence from time to time. The child of my neighbor went into the school, but was forced to quit. The teacher said kindly that the child wisdom developed slow, suggesting to come again next year. In fact the child was refused out of the school. The neighbor sent his child to me and said: “Only you said that the child is not stupid. Look, the school refused, how can say he is not stupid?” I asked the child come to my home, helping me to do house work, telling him to pass me some amount of bowl, or chopsticks, etc. No any problem. However, once we come to homework, everything became mass. Later, I understand, the child had very good memory. Whenever the way of teacher’s teaching does not match his own thinking way, he would try to mechanically remember everything in the classroom. The fingers that come to him now all changes into numbers. This, according to his own logic, is pretty normal, but to others, it appears not only a commonly seen chaotic.

After find the reason, I helped him to order things. I asked his mother send him back to school. The teacher no longer said he is clumsy. It would be very ideal that child can learn according to their own nature. But that the education is called education is that it is to set a unified model. The science thinking is so deep in the mind of teacher, that the content of the teacher is to set fix model for the students for their thinking.  

The first day my daughter came back from school, she told me that her teacher said: “You are all small tree. You need to be fixed, to chop, otherwise you will grow twist”. Not many children are naturally meet the science thinking need, so the teachers first of all need to do is to first deny the thinking way of the children themselves, then replaced with science thinking. The children are fixed straight. Not only their own thinking becomes “straight”, but also not allow others to “slanting”. When I was a teacher in a middle school, the students all pointed out to me: “Teacher, your way of teaching is not correct. The class should not be as such”. I surprised: “You are students, how do you know how to teach?”

Therefore, it is normal that the Chinese medicine is attacked and suppressed. Our education denies ourselves first, then deny others. People think that it would be correct if doing things according to science. They would have right to “fix” others, even to attack and to shout at others with complete confidence. By this way, apart from the science thinking, where would be individual and free thinking? Teaching should be brain washing, but to induce thinking. When I teach << Lung Yu >>, the way I used is to refer to the way of Confucian, to induce the thinking of my students, inducing their interest to think more, far and higher. If the human nature would have had endured “fix” by others without producing any physical and emotional trouble, then it does not matter which way is used in the education.

The child my friend went to elementary school and suffered from frequent urine syndrome. The child needed to go to washroom several times during one class, which made the teacher felt pestered, questing the parents to solve the problem. She brought the child to several hospital but fail. I said, it might be due to the too nervous of the child. We need to help him to relax. But how to make him relax?

My friend could not find a way. I told her, the source of the nervous is in the teacher. That the teacher stares at the child as an eagle stares at a chicken, would stress the child to be so nervous to go to the washroom several times.  But a teacher cares tens of children at the same time, it is not practice to ask her being soft in eyes and kind to always show smile. Indeed she is very tired.

When my daughter went to elementary school, on the windowsill, there were a lot of flowers. On the teacher’s desk, there also always had the most beautiful flower, that is sent by my daughter. The teacher enjoyed these flowers, and sometimes she might even smell them too. I told my friend, the teacher needs to be care. So, the teachers can escape form the tiredness and heavy burden of the work. For example, send her some gift, and send her in time greetings, etc. That parent become a friend of the teacher can soft the eye of teacher. My friend said, would this be a way to suck up to the teacher and to indulge the child? I said, it is the human care for the teacher and your child.

The whole society continued to put press on your child. The person who can protect him is only you. You can not only stand on the side of teacher, but need to bring the teacher to your side. My friend followed what I recommended. Her child’s problem was solved, since whenever the teacher passed from his site, would touch his head subconsciously.

Those who learned science for tens of years usually cannot learn the Chinese medicine. They either say that the Chinese medicine is a pseudo science or say that it is very hard to learn. Some university students, masters, even doctor degree students usually ask my daughter’s master: “How to learn Chinese medicine?” My daughter felt strange: “Asking by them, it appears that the Chinese medicine is so profound. In fact, the Chinese medicine is something that a child can learn. As the match go, even a child can try. The picture of << Nei Jing Tu >> is so scintillating: on the position of the left and the right kidney, standing a boy and a girl drawing water using waterwheel. How vivid it is!”

My daughter said that, the reason she did not feel hard to learn the Chinese medicine, not because she has special learning method or what genius nature, but because she has no block in thinking. This is well due to the fact that I did not “teach” her when she was young.

Chapter 92

Pulse feeling, now it becomes a mysterious thing. My daughter feel pulse, wherever she was, it regarded as mystery. Whenever she go out to other company for something, there would be someone asking her to feel their pulse. Soon a troop of people is set in a line waiting for her to feel pulse. When I was young, people has no idea of physical exam and feel the pulse feeling is an ordinary thing. Without a discomfort, people would not go to a doctor for exam, nor ask for pulse feeling. So there was no such huge event as my daughter feeling pulse for so many people. Now, people see the pulse feeling as Chinese way of annual physical exam. For the ways of annual physical exam, people do not feel bothering how many it is. Current people know much about the annual physical exam. The Chinese pulse diagnosis does not need any blood sample taking, or biopsy, or others. It is naturally accepted by Chinese. This makes my daughter’s pulse feeling usually for the whole department, the whole office, or even the whole company as a collective, one by one, all are felt.

When my daughter spoke out their symptom, one by one, the people around her felt stunned. Such collective pulse feeling makes my daughter have some experience that even my mother had not before. My daughter said, she found that some company stuff have similar trend in their pulses. There is company-dependent phenomenon. She thinks it is associated with the management style of the company.

I felt strange. How can it be? She analyzed that, if most of the stuff in a company showed a Liver stagnation pulse in common, it suggests that that company is managed very clear in level, in degree. The management is strict and the working pressure is huge. In the treatment, the stuff in the whole company can be treated the same time with the same way from beginning. Heard this, I could not prevent from laugh. I said, according to you, from the management of a company can find the health condition of the whole stuff, and from the health condition of one stuff, can realize the management style of that company? My daughter said, the organization efficient and the stuff health are associated. Usually, the last one who came out for the pulse feeling is the “first leader” of that company.

My daughter said, the pulse of the “first leader” of the company is usually not the same as the other stuff. His or her pulse is usually not as stagnation, but overwhelming in Qi. The Qi overwhelming reflecting in the work is with strong potential, high encourage. But, too much and too strong overwhelming would cause the damage of the heart in blood circulation, that increase in blood pressure, so no secure for health either. I said, according to this, to take herbs as a collective is neither the way to treat the root (cause). It is needed to adjust the organization manner? She said: yes. To use the herbs to support the management style is anyway not a long time solution. Management with care of human need is the best way of medicine. I advised her not talking about the company’s management. Do not put into other company’s organization and management. The job of a doctor is to solve the disease. Only talk things related with disease, not go beyond the medicine. Otherwise, people would say that you practice Chinese medicine as a witch to tell people’s future, leaving reasons for others to attack the Chinese medicine.

My daughter spoke slowly: the difference between the Chinese medicine and the western medicine is that, the Chinese medicine pays much attention to the people’s emotion, emphasize the influence of personality and living environment to the health. Would the charming of the future-telling not be the prediction and explanation ability? The prediction and explanation of the Chinese medicine is the derivation based on the current life through a logic evaluation. Though the Chinese medicine cannot show you the lab report, but its prediction and canalization can be approved by later fact. It is not a improper to point out the relationship between the environment and the health.

I said, there is no analysis of a management of a company in Traditional Chinese medicine. I never heard from my mother about the management problem of a company. At that year, when my mother spoke out the life style of a patient, it made people feel mystery. Now, it the Chinese medicine points out the management situation of a company, would it make people feel more mysterious and hard to believe? My daughter laughed and said, the reason that Chinese medicine did not make comment to the management of a company is due to the previous people were not as current time to come as a collective, as a group, it making the Chinese medicine hard to make a summery. Second, in tradition, there was only one management style in Chinese society. There was no way for Chinese medicine to make a comparison. Now, the situation changed. There are the public (government), company, private company and foreign company. If there is no difference for the management styles among these different companies, how we would feel out the difference in the pulses among the stuff in difference companies?  

Chinese medicine can find new conditions every time and change its own development according to the changed time. Would this not be a development with time? In deed, the development of era proposed a lot of new observation and new experience to the Chinese medicine. My friend prepared fruit service. She put the mango and melon all in one dish. We use bamboo stick to stick it into mouth to eat. I said, you choose one kind of fruit to eat, don’t mix it. She asked my the reason. I said I have no scientific evidence, but feel that as human being, our first generation went this way. My friend laughed. She eat along with talk: delicious thing should be eaten together. In addition, these are no toxic thing, no harm food. They would not cause trouble to our body.

Since I can not convince her, I can only observe aside. After a while, she started to cry for a stomach pain, asking for medicine. I was not hurry to find drug for her, but asked carefully her feeling and symptoms, then told my daughter through phone all of this valuable information, since I know that there is no any record in ancient medical literature. In previous age, there would be only the king who had such chance to try what happen if the various foods are eaten all together. I don’t know how many times the king might get pain in his stomach. But, even for the king, he might have no chance to eat the melon and the mongo together. How could I not pay attention to its result?

Recently, the government set out the rule asking to supply nutrition value in the food products. It is ordered to list the nutrition compounds and the usefulness in nutrition. Some one laughed at the Chinese medicine: why the government not ask the label of the Hot, Cod, Warm or freeze for the food? Would it not mean that the Chinese medicine is not scientific value, hard to go to a noble hall?

Of this, I wouldn’t feel approve. I don’t know how much help such nutrition label would be to ordinary people in shopping. Even for a graduate from a medical university, it may have no strong help either. In addition, it does not mean that the nutrition does not change at all during cooking. Chinese medicine cares very much the way of cooking. Even if a food of Cold nature, it might be changed into a Hot food after cooking. Chinese do not eat western food. After cooking, would the nutrition list be re-listed? China has many “degenerated food”, do they have nutrition label?

If the nutrition concept works, would we deplete such “degenerated food” off? Chinese food per se does not suit such nutrition label system. So, to make the Chinese food suit to the science, would Chinese change to eat western food? Nowadays, these people who oppose Chinese medicine think that the development of science is forming the final combat to the Chinese medicine. They feel very happy about it. But what I see is the new life of Chinese medicine in the current age. The application of the nutrition label implies that the science has already linked the food with the health, though it is a shallow level if it is considered only from the nutrition point of view, but it is meaningful. On this way of thinking, the consideration of Chinese medicine is much rich and open than the western medicine, and even more prospective. At the current time, the things that Chinese medicine can do are a lot. If you have will, you might be able, “when the willows in dark, then the flowers in blooming”,  to open a new chapter for science on this “heretical sect” of Chinese medicine.

Chapter 93

Recently I paid much attention in the internet about the information on the earthquake[1]. I saw a lot of reports and comments. This time, the National Earthquake Bereau was blamed very much. They felt very aggrieved the same as a doctor faces the collective attack by patient family. The prediction of earthquake is the world challenge. People should not blame the scientist. But the scientist also feel very angry. They are not angry to the public blame, but to some earthquake experts who said the earthquake can be predicted. It is commonly known that, for the earthquake, to say it can not be predicted, it is scientist; to say it can be predicted, it is a fraud.

In the meeting in May 19 on the Fragrance Hill, some experts proposed: “The whole thinking of Chinese is useful for the prediction of huge earthquake”. Some others suggest that, the earthquake prediction cannot depend only on the professional team and instrument. We should start “Public measure and public prevention” policy, apply some “pubic methods” to collect thousands and hundreds of information to make the prediction. These scientists who suggested to use such “no scientific evidence” and use “specious” means to predict earthquake, were said to be a group of “earthquake experts with Chinese medicine thinking”, and were called the same frauds as Chinese medicine. In the team of the Chinese medicine surprisingly has a group of earthquake experts.

Though I agree that the earthquake cannot be predicted, it does not mean that I do not want to predict the earthquake. There is one day the earthquake cannot be predicted, there would be one day the “fraud” continue trying. Between the “fraud” and scientist, “fraud” is usually more with fighting spirit, more warm to search truth and more care the reality.

Science makes us more rationing, but the loss of many vivid lives within a sudden, the rationing cannot stop our tears. I disagree to say that the earthquake experts are Chinese medicine way of thinking. The earth sample is only one. Even collect thousands of information, it is still the western medicine way of research, not at all bias from science. It is not need to exclude the science.

I myself experienced one failure example of “Public measure and public prediction” to predict earthquake. My home is located on the belt of pacific earthquake. The land shaken from time to time. The previous municipal mayor do not want to depend on the science only for the prediction. He wanted to combine the expert prediction and the public prediction. He visited the experts, installed monitoring instruments, set up observation stations; send observation stuff in the wild animal farms, chicken farms, fish pools, and several of mines, water wells, and springs. The public is also informed to report any abnormal signs to the experts. Several sets of phone on his desk linked directly to several observation stations. There are alarm in the east and the west end of the city with special stuff to care. To make the public getting familiar with the alarm, it has been practiced twice. Whenever there are a serious of abnormal signs, he would live in the office, day and night on duty.

One day, the situation was not favorite. The officer lived in his office for several days. On one night, the phones on his desk run one and another. It was reported: the raccoon dog refused to sleep; fish jumped off water; air bubble raised from the water wells and became not clear. There are also report that the chicken and dog at home were irritable; the rat is moving home… So, the face of the officer changed to pale. His sweet fall down form his face. Finally, he waved his big hand: “pull the alarm!” Just this one order, the whole city broken apart. The miners went to the upper ground; the university students jumped from building; the pregnant women jumped off the bed, run faster than doctor; I brought my daughter run out of the house… However, nothing happened. The next morning, the president of the province called and shouted at the municipal president. The public also set songs to laugh at him in whole city. The municipal president brought a case and went to the provincial city to criticize himself, in a dejected motion.

Later, there were no any people trying to predict the earthquake. The earthquake cannot be predicted. The earthquake Bereau that cannot predict earthquake is still earthquake Bereau. But the way of combination of the experts and public is agued to deplete and is called fraud. From this event, it is not a single event that the Chinese medicine is attacked. It is pretty an example. For many years, the science is trying to keep its purity, performs a high pressure policy as “would have science grass, than pseudo science sapling”. 

However, I don’t feel that the president was wrong in starting the alarm. After the alarm, I went to the suburb. There was wads of black fog in the field here and there;  gunpowder smelled in the air; the moon appeared as a pale paper; several bright silver lines floating in front of the moon up and down… the earthquake bereau measured there would have earthquake that night, thought the degree of the earthquake is not high. I thought, the magma underground continuously floats, tosses and turns, either slowly raise the ground, or break the lands suddenly. As with the brain bleeding, no one knows from where it would come up.

That night, the earth did not quake, but that the brain blood vessel does not break doesn’t mean the blood pressure was not increased to high. These mysterious nature events make me think, the old saying about many spiritual events from old generations might not be superstition, but the earth light, earth sounds and earth Qi is moving. These things would be admitted when they come with the earthquake, not during ordinary days. That president “cheated” us bear no science evidence but should not say that it is without science value.  

In TV, I saw the army soldiers tried very hard and saved life, but the life died very soon. I was hurry to ask my daughter: “Though it is termed the pressing syndrome, can we give the wound person some herbal soup as the Hui Yang Jiu Ni Tang? Do you prepare something for such situation in future?” My daughter was also watching the TV. She said: “The life is as flame. Upon the critical time of the life, it is urgent to save the flame, not to press the fire died with a lot of wood sticks. It is needed to supply the wood stick little by little. This needs to adjust the concept of how to save life”

In this huge event, the western medicine contributed a lot. The Chinese medicine also send out teams of bone wound. But in the saving life, I hope they combined together to increase the survival rate.

I saw that the teachers in the disaster area gave hungry students little cake to eat. It is called to “bring Yang Qi”. Asking students to call each other, remind the mind. All of these are accordance with the Chinese medicine and also very effective. It makes me admire them. Though it was somehow careless for our president starting the alarm at middle night, I though would it be proper to only sound a yellow alarm? Would earth pre-alarming really cause scare? Could human really sleep without any worry? Real life can really exclude the worrying mind away? If we have pre-alarm in ordinary days, it is a better education to human, than the effect from empty political study and moral education. In this way, people would have more practice and the house would be built more solid. All in all, all are benefit without any harm.

It is time that we really need to put the science in a correct position in our life.

Some people lift the science up to the level of God for Chinese. They ask people to respect it, to correct self unclear, to buy the guilty and to endure the disaster without any doubt… But Chinese do not accept any God. That the Christianity was not largely spread in China, and science was not respected largely in China, are not due to the poor science nature of Chinese, but to the fact that Chinese would not set a God for themselves.

The God is too super from ordinary human life. It has too much conflicts with human being.

It is not that Chinese want to go against the science, but that the Chinese culture always wants to bring the God down to the earth to eat the same as human, to be more close to the human. So, Chinese would combine the science and the folk methods and try to have public measure and public prevention to predict earthquake. They would combine the western medicine with the Chinese medicine. If they get sick, they would try various kinds of medical system, the western medicine, the Chinese medicine, and the witch. For this reason, there are “fraud” in China again and again, one after another. This is the true nature of Chinese.

One earthquake quaked out a group of “fraud” with “Chinese medicine thinking”. It makes the team of the Chinese medicine “bad compound” have more members. I think, if there is any disaster in China in future, the team of the Chinese medicine would grow larger.

Chapter 94

I strolled with my friend on the sand beach beside a lake. I picked off a piece of clay, a piece of bone. I told her, they were things six thousands of years ago. She wouldn’t believe. I said, it can be tested and approved by the measurement of earth magnetic or carbon radiation, and so on. She believes these measurement. But would people realize that these measurements are similar to the diagnosis of Chinese medicine? No matter with the measurement of the earth magnetic, the carbon radiation, earth layer precipitated magnetic, or heat emission, year circles in a tree, all are similar to the Chinese medicine: all need to set up a sample, and the age of first group sample is known. First, measure the average value from many of the samples with known age, then get many of the average value from many other groups of samples with known age, finally, using these average values to draw a standard curve as the experiment curve, or the year curve. This is the scale to measure the age of stuff.  

If the comments against the Chinese medicine is rationing, these way of science research should be depleted and stop, since these methods are not only similar to the diagnosis ways of the Chinese medicine, but also have the same problem as the Chinese medicine – the data are not precise. If the data of sample is not precise, could a precise measurement be performed? 

Those who oppose the Chinese medicine think it cannot, since it is not logical. But there are almost no precise sample in the world. Many occasional events could make every sample hardly tolerate the assessment, analysis, or check, resulting in a common phenomenon in many scientific research departments, that the more chasing for a precise, the more not precise. The requirement for a precise approval is hardly met even in science domain. It seems reasoning to ask for precise sample, but not realistic. The reality is “obscure”, but the reference and adjustment of the data among variable scales and many methods, could allow the precise float out from the obscure. Such a way of master the precise from the obscure helps science come out of embarrass.

Therefore, the presence of various measurement methods is to refer and adjust each other. We need many methods to achieve from a blurred or a faint outline to precise. It almost means a suicide of science to keep only one so called the best and the most scientific way, but throw away and ban any others.

Based on large samples of human body structure and functional changes in the four seasons, the Chinese medicine formed the “4 season 8 steps, 24 sub-steps, the 72 conditions”, such diagnosis scale. In such samples, there are this or that errors. These samples can even be criticized and rejected, but continuously checking new samples and adjusting the new data thereafter, including the use of data from western medicine, the error from each old data can be compensated, so makes the Chinese find the precise from the blurred, to ensure the precise of its diagnosis.

One person who lived in US and who opposed the Chinese medicine criticize me that I am not a Chinese medicine doctor but talked about the Chinese medicine is “the evidence of low society: no fine and clear differentiation”. He said that, that the Chinese medicine doctor can communicate with the patient is due to “Chinese medicine belongs to the low level of knowledge of a society” and “the knowledge of a doctor and that of patient is close”. He commented: “in higher and advanced society, the difference in knowledge level between the doctor and patient is huge and it is as huge as hard to image it”, and “the knowledge of western medicine renews it self every seven years”, “the knowledge learned seven years ago is insufficient to pass the exam today”, and “patient would never be able to discuss medical professional questions”.

He made an example: “In such condition, the relationship between the doctor and patient is as that between a judge and a thief. In front of a judge, the thief would always be trembling, waiting the convict by the judge”. He also said: “I use such comparison is to tell Mrs. Ai Ning: it is completely wrong, many of the successful cases by Chinese medicine that you summarized in low society”.

I admit that the examples I proposed can all be criticized and be denied. I did not prepare to insist on individual case. I am, anytime, ready to give up my stronghold in front of criticizes. However, even if I give up all of my strongholds, I may still stand on my position.

The phenomenon of not failure of Chinese makes some people very angry. You would not be a shameless when you defeated but not admitted it? To me however, it is only a continuous correction and adjustment course, no failure to admit. Upon the impact from outside, would having a self adjustment and correction is not to keep alive, how it could be linked to death?

The western medicine is as the grass on the ground. It dies every seven years. I suggest to set a degree level, each of which is seven years, inside the western medicine. Otherwise, it might not be fare.

It is not easy to learn western medicine. Even if I understand all about my body, after seven years, I will become knowing nothing about my body. If I could live to 70, though my body remains one, the western medicine knowledge would have had to be invalid for ten times. If an alien has chance to read my medical reports from doctor, would he consider me ten species 

Can we expand the separation into high (valid) and low (invalid) level western medicine out of the western medicine, for it is hard to learn? If the Chinese medicine is tree stem, can we ask it to change stem every seven years? So far as I know, in US, the law is also hard to learn. Being a judge is not as easier as a doctor. But in front of a judge, a criminal is not always “trembling”, since to judge an accused person is not by a judge, but by a jury composed of ordinary people who do not know the law. The real reason that US does not apply the complete law or allow high level judge to convict, but allow a group of ordinary people who do not know the law, is to prevent the separation of a society into high or low. Such a way of verdict by “low realization” is to tell us: even the highest level law needs to be applied according to the understanding by ordinary people.

In all, the theory of the western medicine can not be approved by authentic proof. Multiple methods are not only needed for evaluating age of stuff, to refer each other, to adjust the data, to make the blurred into precise, but also needed for prevention of science from bureaucrat and from formation of social estate system. The way to apply only one method will help the science go to high level, so high so that it makes the presence of Chinese medicine “guilty”. If what the science needs is only the experiment and observation to prove it, those that cannot approve it would be denied, would the science become real and veritable God?

I am not producing bomb to write article, as it is once produced, it will be shot to target. My aim to write, first, is not for battle; second, is not for disseminating truth; and third, not ask readers to read me. Only after stimulating the reader’s own long time seen, heard, felt, though, could reader feel happy after reading. Once the mind of the reader has been stimulated, the reader might not agree with me for my thinking or idea. He may even criticize me all. I however know, the truth is alive thing. It does not exist in the course of talking, discussion, rationing, or reasoning, but in the movement of spiritual connection and communication between the author and the reader. Only when what I listed, showed, talked and commented is associated with whatever that has been in the heart and mind of the reader, can my words get kind of truth nature. My way of “to throw out a minnow to catch a whale” to complete the connection with reader, and the score with many opinion links, would compensate individual error.

When Chinese medicine can still correct by itself continuously, it would not fall failure in all position after loss of one stronghold. It is lucky that in the combination of the western medicine and the Chinese medicine, there are quite a few doctors who are combining, referring, adjusting them, so to increase the level of diagnosis and treatment. My nephew said, when he practiced surgery, he saw that the president of the surgical department used herbs for patients with intestinal obstruction. He let the patient drink half of the herb tea and use the another half to give an enema. So, the herbs work from both upper and lower part of the body. It works in most cases. Only if it does not work, will an surgical operation be applied.   

(The end)

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